Hu Tao Is Monetizing My Existence. [245]

“So tell me, Mr. Zhongli,” Jiang Bai asked casually, “what exactly do you plan to do with that vessel you won?”

“A wine vessel is naturally used for drinking wine,” Zhongli replied, as though stating something obvious.

He calmly retrieved the ridiculously expensive vessel, rinsed it lightly, then poured himself a serving of freshly brewed dandelion wine as if it were just any ordinary cup.

Noticing Jiang Bai staring fixedly at his cup, Zhongli raised an eyebrow slightly.

“Do you want it?”

“I… do,” Jiang Bai admitted awkwardly, averting his gaze with embarrassment. He felt rather like a beggar at that moment.

Zhongli lifted the vessel and took a slow sip. The crisp dandelion wine was as refreshing as ever, but his expression grew distant.

The same wine, the same vessel, yet the taste of the past could no longer be found.

Setting the cup down, he sighed softly, losing interest.

“Take it then. It’s yours.”

“Huh?” Jiang Bai was dumbfounded.

He involuntarily dug into his ear, making sure he’d heard correctly.

“You’re really giving it to me?”

After a brief moment of joy and shock, Jiang Bai’s suspicion kicked in immediately.

Nothing was truly free—especially a gift worth billions. Zhongli might be generous enough to give it, but he certainly didn’t dare accept it so lightly.

“Alright, Mr. Zhongli, spit it out! What do you want from me? As long as it doesn’t go against Wangsheng Funeral Parlor’s principles, I’ll do anything!” Jiang Bai declared, ready for martyrdom.

Zhongli appeared amused, clearly not expecting such a reaction. He shook his head and smiled lightly.

“No need to worry. If you want it, just accept it.”

This made Jiang Bai even more suspicious.

There had to be a catch when something this valuable was given away casually!

As the saying went: “The gifts of fate have their prices marked in secret.” Some prices weren’t demanded immediately but would surely be exacted eventually.

But Jiang Bai genuinely wanted the vessel. He felt if he had it, he could at least hold his ground against Signora—well, maybe halfway.

After careful consideration, he finally suggested, “How about this—name your price, and I’ll pay you back in installments. What do you think?”

Hu Tao stared at him oddly, unable to understand why he suddenly insisted on paying for something offered for free.

Did he seriously think Zhongli would harm him?

Zhongli chuckled lightly, taking another sip. “If that makes you feel better, very well.”

Seeing Zhongli agree, Jiang Bai visibly relaxed, quickly wheeling himself closer and eagerly massaging Zhongli’s shoulders. “Then, Mr. Zhongli, what price do you think is fair?”

Obviously, 4.5 billion was inflated due to the auction. A realistic price would be much lower.

“Let’s make it an even one hundred million,” Zhongli offered generously.

“One hundred million?” Confirming that Zhongli wasn’t joking, Jiang Bai quickly calculated in his head.

If he split the debt over twenty years, it would be five million Mora annually—just over 400,000 Mora per month, with no interest.

Spread it over forty, fifty, or even a hundred years, the payments would shrink even more!

He could easily manage 400,000 Mora monthly by frequently venturing outdoors, harvesting valuable items, exploring hidden domains, and with his share of Funeral Parlor commissions. Perhaps he’d even stumble upon a valuable artifact someday, settling the entire debt in one go.

Though debt was hardly pleasant, his living expenses were minimal, so it wasn’t impossible.

“How about twenty-year installments?” he suggested.

“Acceptable,” Zhongli nodded.

“Verbal agreements aren’t enough. Let’s draw up a contract!” Jiang Bai insisted.

Zhongli gave a meaningful smile. “Consider carefully. Once a contract is established, it cannot be altered or broken.”

Without a contract, Jiang Bai could still reconsider later. But once signed, the debt would be irrevocable.

“I’m absolutely sure!” Jiang Bai declared firmly.

Only by establishing a contract could he put his mind at ease. Otherwise, Zhongli might leverage the vessel against him in the future.

“As you wish.”

Zhongli quickly drew up a detailed contract, specifying the reason for the debt, the exact amount, the repayment term, and annual payments. To ease Jiang Bai’s burden, he didn’t specify monthly amounts.

After verifying everything, Zhongli signed it neatly, then passed it over.

Jiang Bai swiftly signed his own name and stamped his fingerprint.

Three copies were made: one each for debtor, creditor, and witness.

Hu Tao, the witness, tucked her copy away and solemnly patted Jiang Bai’s shoulder. “From now on, Mr. Zhongli’s retirement fund is entirely your responsibility!”

Zhongli couldn’t help but chuckle at her words. It did sound like an excellent retirement plan—provided he were truly mortal.

He drained the remaining wine from the vessel and placed it gently on the table. “You should take the vessel now.”

“You don’t want to keep it a bit longer?”

“No need. Though the vessel remains unchanged, the flavors of the past can never be restored.”

With Zhongli’s final insistence, Jiang Bai happily took the vessel.

Still curious, Jiang Bai asked cautiously, “Mr. Zhongli, have you seen this vessel before?”

From Zhongli’s words, it sounded as if he’d personally used it long ago.

Zhongli merely shook his head, clearly unwilling to elaborate.

Seeing Zhongli’s silence, Jiang Bai wisely didn’t press further.

But it did confirm one thing: Zhongli had lived a surprisingly long time.

After all, ordinary people rarely challenged gods on a whim.

“Oh, right—show us that other thing you won,” Hu Tao said suddenly.

Glancing at Zhongli and noticing his subtle curiosity, Jiang Bai carefully took out the vambrace.

He didn’t need Zhongli to explain much about this item. Considering Zhongli knew more about Jiang Bai’s origins than anyone else in Liyue, there wasn’t much point hiding anything.

“This is [Baiyuan].”

Though Jiang Bai had forgotten many things, the name came naturally the instant he saw it again.

Zhongli studied the black vambrace closely. It appeared forged from a single piece of an unknown metallic substance, lacking seams or joints entirely.

It was cold to the touch, resonating sharply when tapped, yet felt incredibly lightweight, comparable to ordinary clothing.

Intricate patterns adorned its surface, making it seem less like protective gear and more like exquisite jewelry.

“Mr. Zhongli, can you make anything of it?”

Zhongli shook his head. “I can only sense this item is not of Teyvat.”

“I’ve forgotten much, but I think this is my weapon.”

“A weapon? It clearly looks like just a vambrace,” Hu Tao said doubtfully. “And it’s obviously black—why call it [Baiyuan] (White Abyss)?”

Jiang Bai put his hands on his hips proudly. “My name is Jiang Bai, so naturally, something of mine should be called [Baiyuan]!”

—

T/N: Jiang Bai is White huehuehueh I MEAN THE NAME MEANS WHIT

This is a fan translation of 胡桃拿我冲业绩 by 余溯. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!