Hu Tao Is Monetizing My Existence. [160]

Jiang Bai noticed something was off about Little Ghost today.

He couldn’t quite put his finger on it. After all, the tiny thing only had eyes and a mouth—no proper face—so it was hard to tell what it was thinking.

Sure, the little guy had popped out of Hu Tao’s body now and then before, but never like this.

The moment it appeared, it darted behind Hu Tao’s head, clutching her hair with its tiny claws and peeking out shyly from behind her.

And whenever Jiang Bai spotted it, it would immediately duck out of sight—only to pop back out again a moment later. It would even cover its eyes with one hand and try to sneak a peek through its fingers, like that somehow made it less obvious. Truly, it was the embodiment of covering one’s ears while stealing a bell.

If he could touch the little guy, Jiang Bai honestly wanted to grab it by the tail, hold it up, and demand, “Just say you want to play hide-and-seek already! Why all the sneaking around?!”

Seeing Jiang Bai and Little Ghost exchanging these strange glances, Hu Tao crossed her arms.

“Are you two keeping secrets behind my back?”

Little Ghost froze mid-peek, then flailed its arms and shook its head furiously, trying to prove its innocence.

A soul as pure as morning dew! How could I ever keep secrets from my master?!

“Mm, that’s more like it.” Hu Tao nodded, satisfied, and tapped it back into her ring.

“Director, where’d you get that Yuyu from anyway? Get me one too!” Jiang Bai was genuinely jealous of the adorable little creature.

“Keep dreaming! Yuyu is one of a kind!”

It was the personal guardian spirit of the Director of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor—one and only, no copies, no substitutes!

“Alright, alright…” Jiang Bai sighed, a little disappointed, though not surprised.

Still, if he ever got the chance, he really wouldn’t mind having a little creature like that to follow him around. It was way too cute.

“Director, what kind of souvenirs are we getting?”

They were currently in Mondstadt’s commercial district, preparing to pick up some keepsakes before heading home.

“I’ll get a Mondstadt cookbook for Xiangling, a feather quill for Xingqiu, and I’ve already got dandelions ready for Zhongli, so no need to buy those. But what should we get for Guoba and Chongyun…?”

Hu Tao fell into deep thought.

“Who’s Chongyun?” Jiang Bai asked—he didn’t recognize the name.

“A friend of mine—a thaumaturge from an exorcist clan.”

“Ohhh~”

Still don’t know who that is.

“Well, just like with Xiangling, let’s pick something they’d like most.”

“Then riddle me this: what’s Guoba most interested in?”

“Uh…” Jiang Bai was stumped.

He ventured a guess. “How about… some snacks?”

“They’ll be cold and soggy by the time we get back.”

“Then what do we bring…”

Hu Tao suddenly hit him with a killer question: “By the way, what exactly are you planning to give Xiangling and the others?”

“Whatever the Director gives is what I’m giving too!” Jiang Bai declared with full confidence.

“Pfft.” Hu Tao shot him a disdainful look.

“As if! If you want to give something, get your own! Don’t even think about piggybacking off mine!”

Jiang Bai scratched his head, reluctantly accepting the reality that he, too, needed to buy his own souvenirs.

Luckily, he didn’t have that many friends—just Xiangling and Guoba—so he only had to prepare two gifts.

Still, now that he thought about it, he couldn’t just leave out the undertakers back at Wangsheng Funeral Parlor either…

He quickly fished out Cartis’s money pouch—the one they’d been paid with—and realized he hadn’t even checked how much was inside.

With high hopes, he opened the pouch and began counting the Mora coin by coin.

“Three thousand… one hundred… and fifty-six…”

Jiang Bai’s smile slowly disappeared.

He’d thought that pouch felt nice and hefty, but it turned out to be full of low-denomination coins. All that jingling added up to just over 3,000 Mora.

Then again, it wasn’t all that surprising. Most adventurers didn’t exactly save money. Since they never knew where—or when—they might die, it was common to live day-to-day. “Live for the wine tonight,” as the saying went. Cartis was one of the rare exceptions who’d managed to save anything at all.

The funeral package he bought from Wangsheng had basically drained his entire savings. He’d come to terms with dying already—so it’s not like he would’ve needed to leave money behind.

In other words, Jiang Bai’s dreams of getting rich off that job were completely dashed.

“Sigh…” He could only console himself with the fact that he still had 3,000 Mora—and not zero.

He stepped into a souvenir shop, where the dizzying array of trinkets made it hard to choose.

Jiang Bai glanced at the prices, and his eyes stung from the assault.

He patted his wallet and immediately felt how light it was.

After some deliberation, he settled on a windmill-shaped brooch.

It was small, but had a good weight to it and was finely crafted.

Each one cost 300 Mora. Ten of them came to 3,000—just enough.

Clutching the boxed set of brooches, Jiang Bai’s heart ached.

These aren’t brooches… they’re literal piles of Mora…

He stuffed them into his pocket and continued browsing.

But since he’d taken too long, Hu Tao had already wandered off somewhere in the store.

While he browsed, something caught his eye—a pair of hair ornaments inspired by Windwheel Asters and Mondstadt’s iconic windmills. The design was uniquely Mondstadt.

The craftsmanship was exquisite, colored in shades of blue and green that captured the lightness of the wind. The small windmill atop the accessory even spun when blown by the breeze, just like the big ones on rooftops.

Jiang Bai imagined them clipped onto Hu Tao’s twin ponytails. As she ran, the little windmills would spin with her.

“Boss, can I take a look at this?”

“Excellent taste, sir! That’s one of our newest items—designed by Shanina herself. A limited edition. We’ve only got one pair in the store!”

The shop assistant smiled brightly and took the ornaments out of the display case to show him.

Jiang Bai felt a sense of foreboding the moment he heard “limited edition.” That usually meant expensive.

But now that it was in his hands, he couldn’t just not ask the price.

Besides, “limited edition” was probably just marketing lingo. Once he left, they’d probably bring out another “only pair in stock.”

The accessory wasn’t heavy—its material seemed quite sturdy, though Jiang Bai couldn’t tell what it was made of.

At least it wouldn’t feel bulky when worn.

“How much is it?”

The clerk maintained a pleasant smile as she quoted, “3,000 Mora.”

The smile on Jiang Bai’s face gradually vanished.

“Any chance of a discount?”

“Sorry, sir. Limited items are non-negotiable.” The smile didn’t waver.

Now Jiang Bai was in a bind.

If he still had that 3,000 Mora, this wouldn’t even be a question. But now? He’d be lucky to scrape together 500.

Still, there was no way he could just walk away. It was rare to find something that felt perfect for someone. No matter what, he had to buy it.

“Do you accept trade-ins?”

“We do, but we’ll need to assess the item’s value first.”

“I see…” Jiang Bai wasn’t sure what on him had value, so he just started pulling out anything that might be worth something.

From within his Qingxin Bell, he fished out a handful of things: a few crystals he’d dug up while traveling, some Starsilver ore from Dragonspine, a Ruin Guard core, bones from a juvenile Geovishap, two Crystalfly cores, and a handful of dandelion seeds…

He also had some Glaze Lilies he’d picked near Wangshu Inn and a few Sweet Flowers of varying amounts—but the Glaze Lilies were all wilted, and Sweet Flowers probably weren’t worth much, were they?

—

This is a fan translation of 胡桃拿我冲业绩 by 余溯. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!