He first teleported to the base of the snowy mountain. Taking out the Four-Point Compass, he saw the needle pointing further up the slope — so he kept teleporting higher.
After a few more jumps, the compass finally shifted direction.
Following the new path, Jiang Bai eventually spotted Hu Tao nestled in a small hollow, shielded from the wind, warming herself by a fire.
A smile crept onto his lips. He scooped up a snowball and quietly crept closer.
Then he raised his hand and flung it straight at Hu Tao’s face.
Caught completely off guard, Hu Tao took the snowball head-on.
For a moment, she was just confused — utterly unable to figure out why a random snowball had slammed into her.
She stood up, ready to check if some hilichurls were messing with her, when suddenly — a freshly roasted rabbit leg appeared in front of her.
The rabbit was golden-brown, its skin crackling crisp, still steaming hot.
It was held out to her in someone’s hand. Following the arm upward, she was met with a familiar — and mildly infuriating — smiling face.
“Director Hu, try the roasted rabbit leg!”
Jiang Bai beamed, looking utterly unrepentant, as if he hadn’t just thrown a snowball at her moments ago.
The aroma of roasted meat wafted to her nose. Hu Tao snatched the rabbit leg without hesitation, bit off a chunk, and tore it away with her teeth.
“How’s it taste?”
“Pretty good! You roasted this?”
“Me? Nah, I’ve got no such skill — Albedo made it. I figured you probably haven’t eaten yet, so I brought it over just for you to try.”
Jiang Bai grinned so brightly his white teeth practically sparkled, making Hu Tao a little dazed for a second.
“Not bad, not bad. Very thoughtful of you!”
She rose up on her toes to give him a pat on the shoulder, clearly pleased with her subordinate’s sense of timing.
But then…
“Someone threw a snowball at me just now. Who do you think it could’ve been?” Hu Tao asked casually while chewing, glancing sideways at him.
Jiang Bai put on a look of utter shock. “What?! Someone actually did that? Let me take a look — who’d dare pull a stunt like that?”
He raised a hand to his brow and started scanning the surroundings dramatically.
A second later, he felt a chill snake down his spine — a clump of icy snow had just been stuffed down the back of his collar.
“H-hhsss!”
The sudden ambush made Jiang Bai suck in a sharp breath. He immediately started shivering like he’d been hit with a status ailment, twisting around in a panic trying to shake out the snow.
But his undershirt was tightly tucked into his long johns — the more he wriggled, the worse it got, scattering the snow and soaking his whole back.
“Yeah… no idea which bold soul would dare something like that,” Hu Tao said dryly, her crescent-shaped eyes narrowing. In one hand was the rabbit leg; in the other, she casually tossed another snowball up and down.
Nearby, a tiny ghost clutched a bunch of snow, giggling at Jiang Bai’s misery.
Jiang Bai gave a sheepish chuckle. “Director Hu, I can explain…”
“Go on. I’m listening.”
Hu Tao stared at him, curious just how he planned to talk his way out of this.
Jiang Bai shrank his neck like a turtle, wary of another icy attack.
“I just… saw you out here all alone in the middle of nowhere, freezing cold and all that. I was worried you might’ve let your guard down, so I tossed a snowball over to keep your senses sharp. Didn’t quite aim right, and, well… it hit you…”
It was such a flimsy excuse even he didn’t believe himself.
“Heh. Your aim seemed pretty dead-on to me,” Hu Tao rolled her eyes.
Honestly, the nerve of this guy…
With a flick of her wrist, the snowball landed squarely on Jiang Bai’s face, exploding into powdery white across his features.
“Considering the rabbit leg, I’ll be the bigger person and let it slide,” she huffed, plopping back down by the fire.
Jiang Bai wiped the snow from his face, still smiling, and sat beside her. He gave the fire a little prod, coaxing the flames higher.
“When did you get to the mountain, Director Hu?”
“I reached the base last night. Started climbing this morning.”
Ordinarily, it’d take at least three to four days to get from Liyue Harbor to Dragonspine — even by brisk travel standards.
Hu Tao had cut that time in half, and then some.
Clearly, she’d been pushing herself day and night to get here.
“Director Hu, your pace is seriously fast…”
“Ugh, don’t remind me. My legs feel like they’re about to fall off,” Hu Tao muttered in frustration.
Other people travel with four legs — I’ve been relying on just two.
Next time I take a long trip like this, I’m riding a horse. Hiking, crossing rivers, climbing mountains… my legs are officially on strike.
“Want me to give you a massage? Loosen up the muscles a bit?” Jiang Bai offered tentatively.
Without hesitation, Hu Tao leaned back and stretched out her leg toward him.
He rested her leg across his knee and started kneading through her thick winter trousers.
Jiang Bai didn’t really know how to massage — he just fumbled through, pressing everywhere in hopes of hitting something helpful.
Apparently he did hit a pressure point, because Hu Tao suddenly gasped.
“Hss—ow! That hurts!”
“Hurts good though, right?” Seeing her grimace, Jiang Bai cheerfully pressed harder.
“Okay okay—easier! Take it easy!”
Pain and pleasure — that was massage in a nutshell.
After the treatment, her left leg did feel much looser.
So she plopped her other leg onto his lap without even asking.
“What about you? Weren’t you headed to Mondstadt for bombs? What brings you all the way out here?”
“Was worried about you, Director Hu. Thought I’d come check in.”
“What’s there to worry about? You think I’m gonna get lost?”
“Just didn’t want you to be bored all by yourself…”
They chatted idly like that, finishing the roasted rabbit leg bit by bit. Once the tension eased, the exhaustion from days of travel caught up all at once.
Maybe it was because the person beside her was someone she trusted. Hu Tao’s eyelids drooped — before she knew it, she’d dozed off in the chair.
“Hey, Director Hu…” Jiang Bai was still massaging her foot when he realized she hadn’t responded. Looking up, he saw she was sound asleep.
He gently lowered her leg, then sat by the fire, resting his chin on his palm as he watched her sleep.
She was so quiet like this — nothing like her usual lively, mischievous self.
Seeing her peaceful expression, Jiang Bai’s fingers twitched with temptation. He reached out and lightly poked her chubby cheek.
Just two soft pokes — nothing too risky — then he reluctantly withdrew his hand to avoid waking her and getting smacked.
After tidying up her tent, he carefully scooped Hu Tao into his arms, carried her inside, and tucked her in snugly with a blanket to keep out the cold.
She slept deeply, without the faintest sign of waking.
Her lips moved slightly, and she rolled onto her side, as if savoring something delicious in a dream.
“You’re out like a light… anyone would think I drugged you or something,” Jiang Bai chuckled under his breath.
He zipped the tent closed to keep the wind out, then returned to the fire and tossed on a few more logs.
Dragonspine was bitterly cold — but with the fire crackling by his side, it didn’t feel unbearable at all.
—
T/N: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THIS IS SO FUCKING CUTE GRAH GRAH GRAH HUTAO LET ME TOUCH HUTAOS LEGS IT SHOULDVE BEEN MEEEE
This is a fan translation of 胡桃拿我冲业绩 by 余溯. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!
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