Listening to Klee talk, Jiang Bai had only one thought:
Are all the kids in Teyvat this wild?
If he remembered correctly, Klee’s mother was that Ms. Alice who wrote the Teyvat Travel Guide, right? That book mentioned she had quite the fondness for explosives too. So this is what they mean by passing down the family craft…
Since neither Albedo nor Alice had stopped Klee from making bombs, Jiang Bai naturally didn’t try to interfere either. He simply offered a gentle reminder:
“Bombs are dangerous, Klee. You’ve got to be careful not to hurt yourself.”
“Heehee! Mommy says Klee is protected by good fortune! Klee’s never been hurt by a bomb before!”
She tugged at the hem of her coat, proudly showing him. “Klee even has a lucky four-leaf clover on her clothes!”
“And not just on her clothes—Klee’s hat has one too!”
Jiang Bai patted her head through the hat to quiet her smugness. “Alright, alright. Go set the table—we can eat now!”
“Yay! ヾ(▽)ノ”
Klee hopped cheerfully out of the kitchen, lighting the candles around the house one by one until the room glowed warmly.
Aside from the Sweet Madame, Jiang Bai had also made a few simple side dishes and even sliced some fruit into a colorful platter.
He laid the dishes out on the table one by one. All things considered, it didn’t look half bad.
Klee came back with clean hands and a little napkin tucked into her collar to protect her clothes. Sitting properly in her chair with a knife and fork in hand, she stared at the food with sparkling eyes, swallowing hard.
She’d spent all day working on bombs—Klee was starving.
But she was a polite child. She knew to wait for Big Brother Jiang Bai before starting.
Jiang Bai placed the final bowl of soup on the table and sat across from her.
“Alright, let’s eat!”
“Yay! ヾ(▽)ノ”
With a happy shout, Klee grabbed a big drumstick and stuffed it into her mouth without hesitation, completely unbothered by the heat. Her cheeks puffed out adorably as she chewed.
“Slow down, slow down…”
This was Jiang Bai’s first time making Mondstadt cuisine. He’d followed the recipe to the letter, but had no idea if the flavor was right.
He picked up a piece of meat and tasted it—then nodded in satisfaction.
“I really am talented at cooking. I’m a culinary genius!”
“Klee thinks Big Brother Jiang Bai is a genius too!”
Just as he was basking in praise, a knock sounded at the door.
Klee, mouth shiny with oil, looked up from her chicken, reluctant to put it down.
“You keep eating, Klee. I’ll get the door.”
“Mm-hmm!”
At the door stood a man with tanned skin, wearing an eyepatch and draped in an unfamiliar fur cloak. He leaned against the doorframe with one hand, holding a dish of sticky honey roast in the other.
His posture was completely casual, most of his weight resting on one leg. He squinted slightly, a smile already forming, as if expecting a certain little sweetheart to open the door and beam with joy at his arrival—and at the food he’d brought.
The sound of the latch turning came, and before the door even fully opened, he called out:
“Klee~ Come see what Big Brother Kaeya brought for you~”
But the face that greeted him wasn’t the one he expected—it was a stranger, wearing an apron.
He blinked, startled.
“And you are…?”
Jiang Bai didn’t immediately respond. Instead, he stepped aside and gestured for the man to come in. “You’re here to see Klee, right? She’s in the middle of dinner. Come in and we can talk.”
Kaeya walked into the house, and Klee ran out from the dining room still holding her chicken leg, waving her greasy hand.
“Big Brother Kaeya!”
Seeing her, Kaeya’s eyes curved into a smile. He lifted the plate in his hand with a mock sigh.
“Aww, Klee’s already eating? I was going to bring you dinner—but looks like I was too slow!”
“We just started! Big Brother Kaeya, have you eaten? Come eat with us!”
“Well, I won’t say no to that.”
The three of them sat down at the table. Kaeya was the first to introduce himself.
“Nice to meet you. I’m Kaeya, cavalry captain of the Knights of Favonius.”
“Hi, I’m Jiang Bai—a soul ferryman from Liyue’s Wangsheng Funeral Parlor.”
“Oh? Wangsheng Parlor of Liyue? I’ve heard of it—you’re the ones who handle funerals, right? What brings you all the way here?”
Kaeya rested his cheek on his hand, curiosity gleaming in the eye not hidden by his eyepatch.
“Albedo asked me to pick something up for him,” Jiang Bai replied with a polite smile. “Since Klee was home, I made her some dinner while I was here.”
“I see…”
Before Jiang Bai could say more, Klee had already blurted out the entire story.
“That’s right! Big Brother Albedo wants to blow up a mountain! He asked Big Brother Jiang Bai to get some bombs! And Klee wants to go too!”
Jiang Bai wiped the sweat from his forehead.
This kid—does she have to say everything out loud?!
Can you just casually say you’re going to blow up a mountain?
And anyway—they weren’t actually going to blow up a mountain!
Was she doing this on purpose?
She was doing this on purpose!
She knew Jiang Bai wouldn’t take her along. Everyone at the city gates knew her—there was no way she could sneak out and secretly follow him.
But Kaeya? That was different.
He was the one who had written her Knights of Favonius Survival Handbook. He definitely wouldn’t pass up something like this!
And if he went, then she could tag along fair and square!
Heehee~ Klee’s so clever!
Jiang Bai had no idea about Klee’s devious little plan. He was new here and didn’t know enough about anyone’s personality to guess.
“It’s not mountain-blasting. It’s an experiment. You’re exaggerating.”
But Kaeya’s curiosity had already been piqued. A faint smile played on his lips as he gazed at Jiang Bai, eyes sharp despite his relaxed tone.
“May I ask what kind of experiment?”
Jiang Bai thought for a moment. There didn’t seem to be any need to keep it secret.
Once Cartis’s travel journal was published, this would all become public knowledge anyway. Besides, Albedo was already involved—meaning the Knights had implicitly approved. Even if Kaeya was the cavalry captain, he likely didn’t have the authority to override Albedo’s decisions.
As long as the Grand Master herself didn’t object, the experiment could continue.
“Well, we discovered a giant spike embedded in the summit of Dragonspine. It seems to have fallen from the sky. We’re going to test whether we can blow it apart—or dislodge it—using explosives.”
“A giant spike… that fell from the sky?”
Kaeya’s eye narrowed, his long lashes casting shadows that veiled his unreadable expression.
Then he smiled, bright and interested.
“Well, I can’t possibly miss something that exciting.”
He nudged his chair over until he was right next to Jiang Bai and slung an arm over his shoulder like they were old friends.
“Jiang Bai, my friend—surely you don’t mind bringing me along?”
—
T/N: Classic kaeya, ohh i remember that ntr kaeya art~
This is a fan translation of 胡桃拿我冲业绩 by 余溯. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!
Reader discussion
0 Comments
Be the first reader to share a thought about this chapter.