Hu Tao Is Monetizing My Existence. [12]

“Those two on the watchtowers are Pyro Hilichurl Shooters. Their crossbows can fire flaming arrows. That big one can pull Dendro Slimes out of the ground and use them as shields—it’s the strongest among them.”

“The two eating fruit? They’re like the one you took out with a single hoe strike. They wield burning wooden clubs, and getting hit by one would be a real hassle. Lastly, that one’s a Hilichurl Shaman. Judging by the color, it’s a Dendro Shaman—it can summon thorny vines that really hurt if you step on them.”

Hu Tao quickly briefed Jiang Bai on the Hilichurl lineup below, giving him a general idea of what to expect.

Jiang Bai noted that this was quite a well-rounded formation: sentries, melee fighters, ranged attackers, shields, and even a mage. Definitely more sophisticated than brainless monsters.

“What about the jelly thing?” Jiang Bai pointed at the Slime.

“Oh, that? That’s a Hydro Slime. If we’re talking about offense, well… it can crash into you,” Hu Tao thought for a moment and could only come up with that one attack method.

Large Hydro Slimes could spit bubbles or slam their heads into enemies, but small ones? All they could do was bounce around.

“So, think you can handle all of them on your own?” Hu Tao asked, brimming with excitement.

Jiang Bai twitched slightly at the corners of his mouth. She wants me to fight all of them? Alone?

How much faith did Hu Tao have in him? Or was she just waiting for him to panic so she could swoop in dramatically for a last-minute rescue?

Still, he was kind of tempted to try. What if he was actually strong?

“I’m going in. Director Hu, if things go south, save me!” Jiang Bai took off his backpack and, without hesitation, leaped down with his hoe.

“Go for it! You got this! I’ll cheer you on!” Hu Tao and her little ghost struck a synchronized cheering pose.

Jiang Bai’s strategy was simple: take out the biggest threat first—the Large Hilichurl!

Most people would save the toughest enemy for last, but he decided to do the opposite.

The Large Hilichurl was asleep, making this the perfect chance to land a decisive blow before it could grab its shield. If he could pull that off, the fight would be much easier.

Next, he’d go for the squishy-looking Shaman to prevent it from casting spells.

The archers on the watchtowers would be left for last—unless he could knock them down, there was no way to reach them quickly.

The plan was straightforward. Now it was all about execution.

“Let’s see just how strong the future star of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor really is!”

Hu Tao licked her lips, plopped down onto the ground, and pulled out a handful of sunflower seeds from her pocket, casually snacking as she watched. Her little ghost mimicked her posture, though it was only pretending—after all, it had no seeds to eat.

Jiang Bai gripped his hoe tightly and leaped off the hill, bringing it down hard on the Large Hilichurl’s head.

Bam!

The impact left the Hilichurl completely dazed.

It was a strange sensation—despite having no memories, his body instinctively knew what to do. The moment he took action, muscle memory flooded in: how to minimize fall damage, how to adjust his landing force, even how to strike at the perfect angle to maximize his weapon’s impact.

These reflexes had already been ingrained into his very being. Even without his memories, his combat instincts remained intact.

His attack not only stunned the Large Hilichurl but also immediately alerted the other Hilichurls.

The two Pyro Shooters nocked their arrows. The two club-wielding Hilichurls stopped eating. The Shaman raised its staff.

Faced with an impending counterattack, Jiang Bai didn’t panic. His movements were swift and precise—two more swings of his hoe knocked the Large Hilichurl unconscious, and without hesitation, he hurled the hoe at the Shaman.

The weapon struck the casting Hilichurl squarely, interrupting its spell.

By then, the Pyro Shooters had finished aiming—two flaming arrows shot toward him from different directions.

The air sizzled as the fire-tipped arrows sliced through it. In that instant, time seemed to slow.

Jiang Bai flipped backward, dodging one arrow, then caught the other mid-air. In the same motion, he spun around and flung it right back at one of the shooters.

Hu Tao, still munching on her seeds, widened her eyes in surprise.

“Whoa! Just what was Jiang Bai before this? That’s some serious skill!”

She had been a little worried at first, but now it seemed like he wouldn’t need her help after all.

The Pyro Shooter on the watchtower was hit and sent tumbling down. The other one had to reload its crossbow, so Jiang Bai ignored it for now, shifting his focus back to the recovering Shaman.

His hoe was gone, but unlike Hu Tao, he couldn’t summon weapons at will.

Not that it mattered.

He lunged forward, grabbed the Shaman’s wooden staff, and swung it like a club, smashing it against the Hilichurl’s head.

The Shaman, now weaponless, collapsed unconscious beside the Large Hilichurl, the two of them looking like a pair of fallen comrades.

With the biggest threats eliminated, Jiang Bai efficiently finished off the remaining enemies, taking them down one by one.

When it was over, all five Hilichurls lay neatly in a row, completely defeated.

“Not bad!”

Hu Tao whistled as she leaped down from the hill, landing gracefully in a striking pose.

“As expected of the soul ferryman I picked! My talent for recognizing talent is impeccable!”

While praising Jiang Bai, she made sure to slip in some self-praise as well.

“Director Hu, your judgment is truly unparalleled!” Jiang Bai flattered her right back. It sounded like he was complimenting her keen eye, but in reality, he was just sneakily praising himself.

“But with skills like yours… how did you end up nearly drowning in a river and losing your memory?” Hu Tao mused, puzzled.

Jiang Bai scratched his head. How would I know?

“Eh, whatever! If we can’t figure it out, we won’t bother thinking about it!” Hu Tao clapped him on the shoulder, then grinned. “Either way, you’re part of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor now. Alive, you’re one of us. Dead? You’re still one of us!”

Jiang Bai had the sudden urge to ask if that meant even in death, she’d keep exploiting him.

But considering he was broke and completely dependent on her right now, he wisely kept his mouth shut.

She’s the boss. She’s the one paying me. Can’t afford to offend her.

“Clean this up, then let’s get going!”

Following Hu Tao’s orders, Jiang Bai piled up the Hilichurl corpses and set them ablaze, giving them an impromptu cremation.

Before leaving, she even tossed the Hydro Slime into the fire. As it evaporated into steam, the flames died out as well. Efficient.

As they walked, Jiang Bai couldn’t hold back his curiosity.

“Director Hu, what’s that fire-manipulating ability you use?”

That ability was ridiculously useful—perfect for combat and getting rid of evidence.

“Oh, that? That’s the power of my Vision.”

Hu Tao took out her Vision and showed it to him. Noticing his curious gaze, she casually tossed it into his hands.

“They say those who catch the attention of the gods receive a Vision. With it, you can control elemental energy. Mine is a Pyro Vision, so I can manipulate fire.”

—

T/N: hehe i hope this story has a lot of fluff

This is a fan translation of 胡桃拿我冲业绩 by 余溯. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!