I, Goldie, Am Going to Be a Foolish King! [4]

For the next few days after being tricked, Mr. Goldie still failed to find a chance to make trouble, leaving him gloomy and depressed.

When he disguised himself and wandered the streets, he found every citizen of Uruk wearing a sincere, happy smile. That made him even more unhappy.

Were the citizens of Uruk really this resilient? They had offended a goddess, yet they were still this cheerful.

Well, fair enough. Life still had to go on. As long as they had no intention of assassinating this king, that was good enough.

Gilgamesh returned to the palace, sat down on the luxurious stone throne, and waited for settlement day to arrive.

Check Foolishness Points.

[FOOLISHNESS POINTS]: 15

?

Run virus scan.

Search and eliminate Trojans.

Check for vulnerabilities.

Gilgamesh issued a triple combo of checks like a computer security manager, but there was no response whatsoever.

This should not be happening.

“Siduri. How do the people of Uruk speak of this king?”

Gilgamesh asked Siduri in confusion.

“My king, your wisdom is engraved in the heart of every citizen of Uruk.”

Siduri bowed and replied at her usual unhurried pace.

That was not right, was it?

“Siduri, recall carefully. What did this king do at the festival?”

Gilgamesh refused to give up, attempting to make this sycophantic minister in his eyes recall his mistakes.

“Oh, yes. My king, the goddess Ishtar was extremely satisfied with your offering. She even sent down divine power to help Uruk prosper.”

Siduri’s voice was full of worship.

“That is precisely what this king is asking. She sent down divine punishment… to make Uruk prosper?”

“Yes.”

Gilgamesh’s face darkened. Ishtar liked the stone I gave her? He thought it over carefully.

In the original Epic of Gilgamesh, there was a record of Gilgamesh slaying Humbaba and rescuing the goddess Ishtar, which made Ishtar fall for him, only for Gilgamesh to brutally reject her. But right now, there is no relationship between us at all, is there?

I understand now. Gilgamesh had an epiphany.

Whom the gods would destroy, they first drive mad. Ishtar was retreating in order to advance. First, she would make the citizens of Uruk lazy and unwilling to work through divine assistance. Then she would withdraw her divine power and send down divine punishment. In that case, what would happen to the lazy citizens of Uruk once they had no divine aid?

My Uruk would be done for!

Ishtar was terrifying beyond belief!

If that happened, even working himself to death would not save Uruk. Without Uruk, how was he supposed to be a foolish king?

Seeking death still had to stay within acceptable limits.

He needed to do something while he still had a bit of a good reputation.

Don’t even think about chemical fertilizers or pesticides. We don’t have the conditions for them. If I want to increase yield…

“Siduri. Lead this king to the largest field nearby.”

With a grand wave of his hand, Gilgamesh brought along a few guards and headed for the destination under Siduri’s guidance.

…

“My king, this is the largest nearby field.”

There was pride in Siduri’s voice.

“What has been planted here?”

“Wheat, my king. This is the land of mud, clay, wheat, and sheep.”

Wheat. The alternating-field method should work.

“Gather every farmer here before this king.”

Gilgamesh’s expression did not look very good. After all, straying from the path of a foolish king made him feel rather unpleasant inside.

After all the farmers had arrived, their expressions were somewhat anxious. They did not know why the king had summoned them.

“Sit.”

The farmers cringed and answered in the affirmative, each sitting down in his own posture.

“The season for sowing approaches, does it not?”

After thinking for a moment, Gilgamesh asked the question.

“Yes. My king is wise and attentive to farming. It will be within the next day or two.”

A sturdy man among the farmers stood up and answered respectfully.

Gilgamesh hummed and indicated for him to sow some seeds for him to see.

Although the man was confused, he still began sowing with great effort. The people around him all wore admiring expressions, making his skill at farmwork clear.

“A fine display. Reward him.”

Although the method was wrong, he truly was skilled.

Gilgamesh could not help praising him, then continued, “This year, you will not sow in that manner. This king shall teach you. Take a plot of land roughly this size and divide it evenly into six parts.”

Without units of measurement, Gilgamesh could only step forward and indicate it himself.

“Then dig three of those parts into furrows. To put it simply, carve three shallow rivers into the field like this, and plant the crops only at the bottoms.”

The farmers’ expressions changed drastically, and they all looked toward the sturdy man.

The sturdy man braced himself and stepped forward.

“My king, this wastes land. Each mu of land would only be able to plant half as much.”

Gilgamesh gave him a displeased look.

“Fool. This king’s method will naturally bring forth a greater harvest than that crude sowing of yours. It resists drought, withstands wind, and prevents lodging. When the second year comes, reverse them. Let the old bottoms become the shallow rivers, and let the old shallow rivers become the bottoms. In doing so, the strength of the soil will be restored.”

“My king, please reconsider!”

“We beg my king to withdraw this order!”

“My king! You must not do this!”

The farmers’ eyes had gone red.

The sturdy man clenched his fists and looked straight at Gilgamesh.

“Name yourself.”

Gilgamesh looked at the sturdy man, his heart startled by the look in his eyes.

“Ahad.”

Ahad’s voice was very low.

“Ahad? What is Ahada to you?”

Gilgamesh felt that name sounded somewhat familiar.

“My king, Ahada is my father’s brother.”

“Oh.”

Gilgamesh was shocked. He had never expected that doing a good deed would actually cause such a backlash. He regretted not bringing more guards. There were so many farmers here—what if something happened? Mr. Goldie wanted to take his leave.

The air began to tremble. The sound of the powerful heartbeat brought by King Engine grew louder and louder, and a faint pressure rose of its own accord.

?

What the heck? Why did King Engine activate on its own again… No, impossible. It definitely did not activate because I was nervous.

Would this king be nervous over a trivial scene like this?

Ahad’s heart surged violently. Was the king’s strength truly this powerful? He had originally been the son of a military family, but because his father and brothers had all died in battle, he had lost heart and thrown himself into studying farming.

But he knew exactly what kind of strength corresponded to such a powerful heart.

King Gilgamesh was terrifying beyond belief!

He absolutely could not be opposed by force. Ahad lowered his head.

“Return to the palace.”

Gilgamesh kept a stern face and called for his guards to return to the palace. He walked a few steps ahead of the guards. Originally, the guards should have opened the way in front, but Gilgamesh no longer had the heart for that. What if the farmers attacked from behind? Better to have the guards bring up the rear.

“As expected, that man—King Gilgamesh—is overwhelmingly powerful.” Ahad stared at Gilgamesh’s retreating back. “He actually does not fear assassins and walks ahead of his guards. His back is as brave as a general charging at the front when leading troops.”

“Ahad, what do we do?”

The farmers were all extremely anxious. After all, this was a major matter tied to their lives.

“No matter. I will ask my father’s brother to remonstrate with him!”

T/N: :sob: kings engine is so goated

This is a fan translation of 我金闪闪要当昏君 by 五色猫 Rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!