You Will Regret This Ichinose! [110]

After taking his sweet time, Uesugi Gen finally arrived at the scene—casually munching on an ice pop.

By now, the entrance to the locker room was completely packed with a crowd of curious onlookers. Students stretched their necks, eager to get a glimpse inside and figure out what had happened.

Flashing his Student Council Vice President badge to the security personnel at the door, Uesugi entered under the watchful eyes of the gathered students.

The moment he stepped in, he froze in place for a good few seconds before finally letting out a single exclamation.

“Wow. What a spectacle.”

The once-pristine locker room was now thick with the stench of sweat and a faint trace of blood. Shoes, towels, and water bottles were scattered haphazardly, clear signs that they had been used as impromptu weapons. Some locker doors bore deep dents—one in particular eerily shaped like the back of Ryūen Kakeru’s head.

On the floor lay the defeated—though whether they were one side or two sides remained up for debate. Eight figures sprawled across the room in various states of disarray. The strongest among them, Yamada Albert, was slumped in a corner, his usually impenetrable sunglasses shattered. Ishizaki Daichi lay facedown, his expression twisted in pain. The others looked just as miserable, all strewn about like casualties of a battlefield.

And then, in the dead center of it all, the two most conspicuous figures—Ryūen Kakeru and Nagumo Miyabi.

Ryūen was completely bruised and swollen, his face puffed up like a pig’s. He lay spread-eagle on the ground, his shirt completely torn open, exposing his well-toned chest. Judging by the abrasions and bruises on his exposed skin, he had clearly been the one who resisted the most.

As for Nagumo, it seemed like he had been taken out in a single blow. On the surface, he didn’t appear too injured—except for one glaring detail.

His pants… were gone.

One side of his pristine, white underwear peeked out for the world to see.

Of course, that was if one ignored the massive size-42 shoe print on his face—and the way he was draped over Ryūen’s chest in a posture that could only be described as compromising.

“Hmm. Yeah, I need to take a picture of this.”

Snapping out of his daze, Uesugi pulled out his phone and snapped a few photos for posterity.

“I called you here to help, not cause more trouble.”

Horikita Manabu rubbed his temple, already feeling a headache coming on.

“That just shows how little you understand. Ever watched Detective Conan? At a crime scene, if the police haven’t arrived yet, the first thing you do is take photos for evidence. I’m just being thorough.”

Uesugi confidently declared, armed with the knowledge of watching over a thousand episodes of Conan.

“They’re just unconscious. We’ll find out what happened once they wake up.”

“Tsk, tsk, tsk.”

Uesugi wagged a finger at him.

“That’s where you’re mistaken. In most cases, if there’s no corpse, the victim usually has no memory of the culprit’s face.”

As if to confirm his words, one of the unconscious students—Komiya—suddenly muttered in his sleep.

“P-Perv—! A masked perverted voyeur freak!”

“…???”

Silence fell over the room.

A masked perverted voyeur freak was the culprit?

Horikita Manabu instantly latched onto the most critical part of that statement—voyeurism.

His sharp gaze immediately darted toward the air vent connected to the boys’ locker room.

“So, the perpetrators tried to spy on the girls’ locker room using some kind of device. But something must have gone wrong, and they ran into Nagumo’s group. To cover their tracks, they knocked everyone out…?”

Even as he said it, he found it hard to believe.

Nagumo Miyabi’s combat ability was among the best in the second-year students. The idea that someone could take him and Ryūen’s entire group down without sustaining any visible injuries was downright absurd.

Which meant—

If they ruled out a third-party attacker, it could only mean that the two sides had fought each other and ended in a mutual knockout.

No—Ryūen’s group was clearly the victor. They looked worse off, but apart from Ryūen himself, their injuries were mostly superficial.

Komiya’s sudden outburst had likely been an attempt to mislead the investigation, fabricating a nonexistent “masked voyeur” to paint themselves as the victims and escape blame.

Ryūen had a track record of pulling stunts like this. The school usually turned a blind eye, but Horikita wasn’t about to let it slide.

As he pondered, Uesugi nonchalantly grabbed Albert’s cracked sunglasses and put them on, a smirk tugging at his lips.

“And you call yourself the Student Council President? You really couldn’t figure out something this simple?”

Horikita adjusted his glasses, unfazed.

“Oh? Then why don’t you enlighten me?”

“Very well! Witness the brilliance of Detective Uesugi Gen!”

Uesugi dramatically pushed up the sunglasses and began his “deduction.”

“First, the culprits set up some kind of hidden recording device in the girls’ locker room.”

“But! Before they could carry out their wicked deeds, our righteous hero, Ryūen Kakeru, discovered their scheme and immediately reported it to his equally righteous ally, Student Council Vice President Nagumo Miyabi!”

“Little did they know—the masked voyeur freaks had anticipated their interference!”

“As our brave warriors prepared to ambush the culprits, they suddenly realized they had underestimated the enemy’s combat prowess!”

“One by one, they fell—defeated!”

“In the end, only two remained—Ryūen Kakeru and Nagumo Miyabi, locked in a desperate struggle.”

Uesugi paused dramatically before continuing in an impassioned tone.

“Throughout the battle, the strong and rugged Ryūen found himself unconsciously shielding the delicate and handsome Nagumo.”

“And in the midst of that perilous moment, the bond between them transcended mere rivalry.”

“In the final seconds of their consciousness, Ryūen finally realized—he had always harbored feelings for the esteemed Student Council Vice President.”

“And at last, Nagumo too, acknowledged the emotions that had long lingered between them.”

“Their eyes met.”

“And thus—they embraced in the throes of fate, their bodies entwined in a tragic tableau.”

As he finished, Uesugi pulled off the sunglasses, wiping away nonexistent tears.

“And that… is how this crime scene came to be.”

“As for the true culprits—”

Uesugi turned to the security personnel.

“Who were the first ones to discover the scene?”

“Class D’s Yamauchi Haruki and Ike Kanji. Strangely, despite opening the door, they didn’t immediately report it. Instead, it was other students who sounded the alarm.”

“The first to find the crime scene are often the prime suspects. But according to Conan’s Law, there are always three culprits…”

Uesugi waved his hand dramatically.

“Add in their usual partner-in-crime, Ayanokōji Kiyotaka, and voilà—we have our masked voyeur trio!”

“Case closed!”

“…???”

Horikita Manabu’s eye twitched.

He had never regretted calling Uesugi over more than he did in this moment. Massaging his temple, he finally spoke.

“You’ve completed your assignment. Go back to whatever nonsense you were doing. I’ll handle the rest.”

With that, he physically shoved Uesugi out of the locker room.

“Wait! Believe me! That’s definitely what happened!”

“I’m serious! You have to trust me!”

“Trust meeeee—!”

—

T/N: LMAOOO finally some fucking yaoi

This is a fan translation of 人在实教，一之濑你会后悔的 by 作者：白良. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!