“So, where did she even come up with this ridiculous script?”
In the office, Luo Qing multitasked, controlling the livestream while throwing in a jab at Furina’s speech draft.
Who in their right mind would start a speech like that?!
Then again, this was Furina—so it was entirely within reason.
On the screen, the citizens gathered at the Vasari Colonnade seemed to mirror their Archon’s enthusiasm, raising their hands and cheering along with her.
Just as Luo Qing started to believe the livestream might actually proceed smoothly, Furina suddenly glanced his way. Her eyes seemed to convey a desperate plea:
I forgot my lines.
“…”
Fortunately, Luo Qing had anticipated this.
With a quick thought, he muted the livestream audio and launched into a tirade.
“I stayed up all night helping you rehearse, and you forget the lines after one sentence?!”
“I…”
Knowing full well she was live and couldn’t afford to do anything out of character, Furina forced herself to maintain a dignified smile, even as Luo Qing berated her.
To be fair, she’d always disliked speeches—boring, tedious, and wholly out of her comfort zone. Her lack of practice and live improvisation skills were hardly surprising.
“Stop looking around. Focus on the script in front of you.”
Luo Qing grabbed a stack of papers and placed them beside the recording device, positioning them just close enough for Furina to read.
“Oh…”
Clearing her throat in a feigned display of composure, Furina redirected her gaze toward the script and began reciting.
“Good morning, citizens of Fontaine. Today, I’ve gathered you here for two reasons. First, to recognize your contributions to Fontaine. Second, to introduce a groundbreaking device developed by the scholars of Sumeru…”
As she continued reading, Furina couldn’t shake the realization that something felt off.
Wait a second… this isn’t a speech—it’s a sales pitch!
I’m the Hydro Archon, the ruler of Fontaine, and I’m being used to sell Luo Qing’s merchandise?!
But it was too late to back out now. Interrupting midway would only make things worse, so she gritted her teeth and soldiered on.
Meanwhile, Luo Qing wasted no time seizing the opportunity. While Furina read the “script” aloud, he directed Natalia and the others to begin promoting the device to the crowd at the Vasari Colonnade.
As Furina’s voice echoed from the holographic projection, Natalia and her team moved among the crowd, holding up Void Terminals and calling out:
“Step right up! Get your very own Void Terminal—just like the one Furina herself uses! Only 50,000 Mora! Supplies are limited, so act fast!”
The citizens of Fontaine, naïve and trusting, hardly questioned the sudden sales pitch.
If the Hydro Archon endorses it, it must be good, right?
Not only did they buy, they bought in bulk—ten terminals at a time, determined to share the product with their entire extended families.
Within moments, Natalia and her team were swarmed by eager customers, each worried they’d miss out on owning the same Void Terminal as their beloved Archon.
Of course, Furina was oblivious to the chaos unfolding in the Colonnade.
She remained stiffly seated, reciting Luo Qing’s script with growing frustration. Inwardly, she was already plotting her revenge. Perhaps exiling him to Meropide for the crime of deceiving a god would suffice.
Meanwhile, at the edge of the Vasari Colonnade, a woman in a white tailcoat stood in the shadows, observing the commotion with a cold expression.
“Master…”
Beside her, Lynette’s soft voice broke the silence. “Should we purchase one of those Void Terminals as well?”
“No need,” Arlecchino replied with a faint shake of her head.
“Unless you want Luo Qing to crawl into your mind and take control of your body.”
“Wha—?”
Lynette was taken aback.
She had assumed the Void Terminals were part of some cooperative venture between Sumeru and Luo Qing. Never had she imagined such a sinister truth.
Wearing one would allow Luo Qing to invade your thoughts and control your actions? That’s… horrifying.
“But, Master, if that’s true, then how did Luo Qing convince the Hydro Archon to help him promote it?”
Lynette hesitated, her words trailing off as her imagination began piecing together the implications. If the Void Terminals truly held such manipulative power, what sort of deal had Furina struck with Luo Qing?
She didn’t want to think about it further.
“It doesn’t matter. Stick to the plan, and make sure our people avoid those devices at all costs,” Arlecchino instructed, turning toward the shadows.
As she walked, her thoughts churned.
If obtaining a Gnosis required going against Fontaine, Neuvillette would inevitably become an obstacle. But why was Luo Qing aligning himself with Furina?
Did he genuinely believe she’d hand over her Gnosis to him?
—
Palais Mermonia
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Furina finished reciting Luo Qing’s script and concluded the livestream.
She had initially prepared a comprehensive speech—covering everything from Fontaine’s future development to the daily lives of its citizens. But thanks to Luo Qing’s meddling, it had devolved into nothing more than a glorified sales pitch.
“You—!”
The moment the livestream ended, Furina stormed over to Luo Qing, grabbing him by the collar in a fit of rage.
“Are you trying to get exiled to Meropide and spend the rest of your life dealing with permits?!”
“Calm down.” Luo Qing raised his hands in mock surrender, unfazed by Furina’s fury. “You forgot your lines. I simply saved the day with the backup script. Hardly my fault.”
“You—!”
Furina sputtered, momentarily at a loss for words.
“And besides,” Luo Qing added with a shrug, “if you didn’t like the script, you could’ve stopped anytime and ad-libbed your own speech. I didn’t force you, did I?”
“You…”
“You knew I’d forget my lines, didn’t you?!” Furina accused, her expression livid.
“Now, now, Hydro Archon, let’s not make baseless accusations. I’m not the God of Time—I can’t see the future.” Luo Qing smirked.
“Besides, the citizens seem thrilled. Why worry?”
“What do you mean by ‘thrilled’?” Furina demanded.
“Exactly what it sounds like.” Luo Qing pulled out a small portable screen, showing her the live footage from the Vasari Colonnade.
The display revealed an enthusiastic crowd scrambling to purchase the Void Terminals that Furina had just promoted.
Truth be told, Luo Qing hadn’t anticipated her sales pitch to be so effective.
“Our Void Terminals are practically selling out. We should toast to your success, Hydro Archon!”
“…”
—
This is a fan translation of 原神：这个见习执行官太屑了 by 何一乐. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!
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