Uma Musume: Your Uma Has A Problem! [15]

Meanwhile, Rudolf, just off the track and walking down the exit tunnel toward the backstage area, spotted a few familiar faces.

“Yo! Maruzensky, Kagura, Trainer—you all came!”

“Of course I did! How could I miss Rudolf’s debut? That run just now was so—cool! Kagura-chan couldn’t take her eyes off you!”

Arms full of Kagura, Maruzensky offered an exaggerated congratulations.

“Congratulations, ojou-sama. You were really cool out there.”

Kagura wriggled a hand free from Maruzensky’s grip and gave Rudolf a thumbs-up.

“Thanks for the support. I’ll keep running just like this in the future.”

With that, Rudolf stepped forward, cupping Kagura’s soft cheeks between her hands and rubbing them gently. Her palms, warm after the chilly breeze above, made Kagura feel cozy inside.

Kagura didn’t really dislike this kind of closeness, but she still couldn’t figure it out—why did becoming an Uma mean everyone around her suddenly wanted to hug, rub, or pinch her? Speed-sama, Rudolf, Maruzensky… was she just that pleasant to squeeze?

“Congratulations, Rudolf. A beautiful victory.”

Compared to a classmate, Tojo Hana, as trainer, was much calmer. She only stepped up and gave Rudolf a light pat on the shoulder.

“Sorry, Trainer. I didn’t follow your race plan at the end.”

“It’s fine. Your grasp of the situation was sharp, and you made the best choice. Whether it’s my tactics or yours—if it wins the race, then it’s the right one.”

When Kagura had been watching from above, she’d heard the trainer’s voice, a faint worry when Rudolf suddenly broke away in the second half. But Rudolf’s performance had quickly put her at ease.

“By the way, Rudolf, aren’t you about to go do the Winner’s Concert? Shouldn’t you be getting ready?”

Outside, the crowd was still roaring Rudolf’s name. Maruzensky’s reminder came almost playfully.

“I’m heading there now. Want to come backstage with me, Maruzensky, Trainer?”

From their chatter, Kagura learned of something new about racing—the “Winner’s Concert.” Only the victor could ascend the post-race stage, where they would sing and dance to show their charm to the audience.

Why does such a victory system exist?! It doesn’t even touch running at all, and just sounds super oyster-inducing! Isn’t Uma Musume supposed to be a sports series?!

The others looked happy about it, though. Unable to understand, Kagura could only grumble inwardly. She remembered her otaku roommate had called this a healing “sports anime” when recommending it…

Something’s definitely off in this world… forget it. It’s not me going up there. If ojou-sama’s happy, that’s what matters.

Seeing Rudolf full of confidence, Kagura sighed and set the strangeness aside. She’d never be on that stage anyway. As a spectator, she could just sit back and enjoy. She didn’t actually dislike idol-style performances.

Following Rudolf into the backstage for the first time in either of her lives, Kagura was curious. Maruzensky slipped in too. Only Tojo Hana stayed outside, saying she didn’t want to intrude on the children’s celebration.

“Wow… Kagura-chan, you can do makeup? You really know a lot for someone your age—you’re amazing…”

Maruzensky, returning from a quick stroll around the backstage area, found Kagura at a mirror doing Rudolf’s makeup and was surprised.

“Just a little. I learned from the head maid before. Ojou-sama’s so pretty she doesn’t need much anyway—just something simple.”

Kagura smiled modestly while working carefully on Rudolf’s face.

Uma were naturally beautiful. Makeup was easy on them—no elaborate tricks needed. Kagura had yet to see a single Uma with poor looks. Even Speed-sama, despite her age, carried herself with energy.

As for how Kagura picked this up, partly from observing the head maid… but mostly from her two-dimensional best friend back in her past life, who loved cosplay. Kagura had often been roped into helping with makeup, and over time she’d learned plenty of odd techniques.

In no time, Rudolf’s makeup was done. Kagura checked the clock. The stage was soon to begin.

“Didn’t think you’d be so good at makeup at your age… our head maid could probably learn a thing or two from you.”

Knowing her own maid’s level, Rudolf chuckled.

“No no, you’re exaggerating. I’ve still got a long way to go. Right, ojou-sama, you must be hungry after such a tough run, aren’t you? Is there anything you’d like to eat?”

Kagura remembered her assignment from Speed-sama on the way here and asked.

“Eh? Didn’t the old lady book the hotel? We can just let them handle it.”

“Speed-sama said I should borrow the hotel’s kitchen and cook dinner for you. She said you absolutely had to taste it at least once. I don’t know why, either…”

Kagura couldn’t quite understand Speed-sama’s insistence. She liked Kagura’s cooking, yes—but to give up a hotel banquet for it? At least the hotel kitchen had a rentable section, so Kagura wouldn’t be left without a stove. She’d only need to shop for ingredients.

Pushing away her questions, Kagura focused on the task. Pulling out a small notebook and pen, she looked at Rudolf and Maruzensky.

“Ojou-sama, do you have any preferences? Or dishes you especially like? For now I only know Chinese and Japanese cuisine—I’m not good at Western food yet. Maruzensky-san, you can tell me too. As long as I can make it and find the ingredients, I’ll cook it tonight.”

“That old lady really does like to make trouble… but as long as you can handle it, Kagura. I don’t have any particular cravings. Just something light. Maruzensky?”

“I’m not picky~ something a little sweet would be nice.”

“Got it. Then relax and go shine on stage, ojou-sama! Dinner will be waiting.”

Kagura jotted down the notes, tucked away her book and pen, and prepared to leave. She wanted to watch the so-called Winner’s Concert from the stands, then go shop for food.

“Kagura-chan, it’ll be hard carrying groceries alone, won’t it? Let me come too!”

The moment she mentioned buying ingredients, Maruzensky volunteered with unusual eagerness. Kagura found her enthusiasm a bit suspicious, but…

“Sure! If Maruzensky-san doesn’t mind, I’d be glad for the help. I’ll come find you after the stage.”

Kagura accepted. She hadn’t brought her little shopping cart this trip. An extra pair of hands would help a lot.

Curiosity drove Kagura to the audience seats to see the “Winner’s Concert.” She had to admit—it was spectacular. At least Rudolf’s performance was. As an idol concert, she’d rate it a solid 90.

But what does this have to do with racing at all!!

She still couldn’t make sense of it. Then again, this was an anime world. No point overthinking.

“Question! Kagura-chan, do you long for a stage like that?”

A sudden voice startled her. The orange-haired girl was beside her again, smiling warmly, the cat atop her hat chiming in with a meow.

“Me? I think idols are dazzling… but I don’t think I’m suited to it.”

Startled by Akikawa Yayoi’s sudden appearance, Kagura quickly regained her composure and shook her head.

“Why? You don’t like it?”

“It’s not dislike… just… I don’t think I’m someone who can shine like that. For me, just being a maid is enough.”

“So you lack confidence?”

“…You could say that.”

Kagura didn’t hate idols. But she wasn’t her otaku friend. To do what they did was impossible for her. And she had no self-confidence. She was just an ordinary girl—nothing like Rudolf’s aura.

Akikawa nodded thoughtfully, her clear blue eyes blinking.

“Curious! At the end of Rudolf’s race, you didn’t look happy. What were you lamenting? Or were you afraid?”

She noticed that? So the director was watching me the whole time…

Kagura hadn’t expected even her fleeting sympathy for the losing girls to be seen. Clearly Akikawa’s perception far exceeded her childlike looks.

“I just thought… the other Uma were unlucky. All their sweat, all their effort—dwarfed by such radiance. Nothing is more despairing than a hardworking genius. Don’t you think?”

“Oh—”

Akikawa let out a soft exclamation, staring at her with interest.

“Question! If it were you on the track instead of Rudolf, would you feel guilty?”

“No. Like in exams—only a few can score top marks. If you want to rise, you need the resolve to crush others’ dreams. Rather than hand out charity victories, it’s better to do as Rudolf ojou-sama did—win with such power that the others think, ‘Losing to her is only natural.’”

Kagura paused, recalling something she’d heard from Eclipse, then said:

“…‘In my era, every rival saw defeating me as the highest honor.’ That’s the mindset a champion should have, right?”

If she stood on the track, if she had Rudolf’s power, Kagura would do the same—crush mercilessly. That was the correct way to face competition.

She had sat through countless entrance exams in her past life. Compassion was pointless. Seats were limited. If you got in, it meant someone else didn’t. Nothing to pity. Wavering in such moments was foolish.

Though honestly… if I were up there, I’d probably be one of the crushed. That speed was beyond human limits…

She thought of the finish—Rudolf so fast she seemed to fly over the grass, too quick even for Kagura’s eyes to follow. A monster.

Akikawa looked pleased, grasped Kagura’s hands, leaning in so close their faces nearly touched, her eyes sparkling.

“Admiration! Kagura-chan, I like you very much! How about joining Tracen? I can let you skip the first screening straight into the written exam, with the director’s personal guidance!”

“Eh?! Um… Director Akikawa… I don’t think that’s…”

“Stop it, Akikawa. I still want Kagura’s cooking.”

Speed-sama appeared, having lingered in hiding, and gently pulled the overexcited Akikawa back. She wore a satisfied smile too. She had half-expected Kagura’s gentle nature to pity the defeated Uma. Instead, Kagura’s answer exceeded her expectations. Her estimation of the girl rose again.

“Eh—Speed-sama, when did you get here?”

“Just now. I stepped out of the elevator and already heard Akikawa poaching my maid. That won’t do. Kagura’s spoiled me with her cooking—I can’t give her up.”

Speaking with mock solemnity, Speed-sama even pulled Kagura against her, shielding her possessively with one arm.

“Regret! But if Kagura-chan ever wants to come, you’re always welcome at Tracen. Just tell the green onee-san at the gate. She’ll bring you in.”

“Uh… o-okay…”

Overwhelmed by Akikawa’s sheer intensity, Kagura stammered her reply.

Green onee-san? That’s… a dangerous nickname… If she heard that, she’d be furious!

Kagura remembered the first time she saw that woman at Tracen’s gate—so green, so shiningly green. She still couldn’t fathom why anyone dressed that way in daily life.

As Akikawa hummed a cheerful tune and left, Kagura finally exhaled in relief. Rudolf’s performance was nearly over. It was time to set out for groceries.

—

This is a fan translation of 你这后勤马娘有问题啊 by 惰性大发 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!