Some time later…
In a café not far from the training grounds, two figures sat facing each other, an awkward silence lingering between them.
After returning each other’s phones, Kitahara Sota and Agnes Digital had hastily found excuses to slip away from the training ground. Thankfully, since one of them was Agnes Digital, no one found their sudden departure suspicious.
Nearly an hour had passed since they’d left. Even the coffee on their table had grown cold, yet neither knew how to break the silence.
Another quarter-hour ticked by before Agnes Digital finally caved, unable to endure the tension any longer.
“Um, Trainer Kitahara, that ‘Anon Reply B’—that was you, wasn’t it?”
“Nope. You must’ve seen wrong,” Kitahara replied immediately.
“…Are you trying to fool me, or are you trying to fool yourself?”
Digital sighed deeply and continued, “Also, according to my information, the original poster, ‘Anon Reply A,’ and ‘Anon Reply B’ are all the same person. So…you started that thread yourself and argued with yourself?”
Kitahara fell silent briefly, then finally spoke.
“If I said no, would you believe me?”
“…No.”
“Then why even ask?”
Kitahara leaned back in his chair, expression turning increasingly melancholic.
“If you have any more questions, just ask.”
When in doubt, embrace apathy.
Yet, even with his encouragement, Agnes Digital didn’t immediately ask anything. She simply stared at the cold coffee in her hands, lost in thought.
Indeed, countless questions filled her mind—why Kitahara had made that thread, why he’d deliberately tried to tarnish his own reputation, and why he’d gotten so heated while arguing with her…
But the thing was, she could clearly sense he didn’t want to discuss it.
Though both she and Agnes Tachyon shared a surname, their personalities couldn’t have been more different. Tachyon was always willful, doing whatever caught her interest. Digital, on the other hand, tended to consider the feelings of others more carefully—except, of course, when it came to her Uma Musume obsession.
Thus, despite the numerous questions that burned in her heart, Agnes Digital ultimately chose to swallow them all down.
“I…I don’t have any questions,” she finally said, hesitantly.
She continued earnestly, “And I swear by the Three Goddesses that I won’t mention this to another soul.”
Kitahara raised an eyebrow, somewhat surprised.
“Are you sure? You won’t get another chance. Even if you beg later, I won’t answer.”
“…I’m sure.”
She said it with visible struggle, the turmoil in her heart plain to see.
Kitahara, amused by her pained expression, chuckled lightly. Then, facing Digital’s resentful stare, he coughed slightly and relented.
“Alright, fine. I can’t give you the details, but just know—I’m doing it for Eclipse’s sake.”
That wasn’t technically a lie. He was doing this to prevent Eclipse from dragging more people into the team, so, indirectly, it was for her benefit. How Agnes Digital would interpret it, however, was another matter entirely.
And, unsurprisingly, Digital’s expression immediately changed upon hearing that explanation.
Rather than realizing he was wary of Eclipse, her reaction seemed to suggest she’d understood something completely different.
“I see…” she murmured, eyes sparkling blissfully. “That’s just…so wholesome…”
Wait, what exactly did you think I meant?
Kitahara was intensely curious but didn’t dare ask aloud.
Once the conversation moved past that awkward topic, the mood eased noticeably. After finishing their cold coffee, Kitahara ordered two fresh cups as a small bribe to keep Digital quiet.
Digital accepted his “bribe” openly.
After a few more sips, she spoke again.
“Trainer Kitahara, I’ll pretend the previous incident never happened, but could you possibly answer another question for me?”
“What is it?”
Digital hesitated briefly before looking up with seriousness.
“You’re actually an incredibly skilled trainer, aren’t you?”
“Nope,” Kitahara answered immediately.
Digital: “…”
This man really had no shame about lying through his teeth.
Seeing Kitahara’s blatant denial, Digital uncharacteristically pushed forward.
“I don’t believe that.”
Her voice was steady and sincere.
“I’ve joined most of the teams here at Tracen at some point. I’ve interacted with nearly all the trainers here, including those who’ve already left. The trainers admitted into Tracen’s main academy are elite, and those who manage their own teams are among the elite of the elite. Yet, even among them, I’ve never encountered someone like you.”
“Just by glancing, you can accurately determine an Uma Musume’s physical condition and immediately devise tailored training plans, even adjusting their running form in record time…”
“It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say you’ve already surpassed the definition of a trainer. You’re practically a ‘legend.’ Or perhaps I should call you—Kitahara Sota, the walking Urban Legend, the living Uma Musume Wish Granter?”
As the person within Tracen Academy with the most comprehensive information network, Digital naturally had no trouble uncovering details about him. However, curiously enough, when she’d first attempted to investigate him—motivated initially by curiosity about Eclipse—she’d faced unprecedented difficulties.
Normally, with her abilities, investigating a trainer thoroughly would take an hour, half a day at most if they were particularly mysterious.
Yet she’d been investigating Kitahara ever since the start of the semester and had only finally pieced everything together this past weekend, confirming his identity as the legendary “Walking Uma Musume Wish Granter.”
Moreover, she’d encountered strong resistance during her investigation. Curious, she’d probed the source of this resistance, only to nearly fling her phone away in shock:
The Symboli family.
Very likely the main branch itself.
Of course, Digital had immediately abandoned any further digging. While she often fed information to Symboli Rudolf—thus having at least an acquaintance-level relationship with the President—she had carefully avoided mentioning Kitahara’s case after realizing the Symboli family’s involvement.
Though Digital had no desire to meddle in the Symboli family’s affairs, after discovering Kitahara’s true identity, she’d come to a different conclusion.
“So what exactly are you trying to say?” Kitahara finally asked, sensing Digital’s unusual seriousness.
Given the earlier incident, he was fairly certain she wasn’t about to threaten him. But her intense seriousness—far more intense than when she’d discussed their earlier forum battle—made her intentions unclear.
Yet he didn’t have to wonder long, as Digital immediately revealed her intentions in the next sentence:
“I want to become your student, Trainer Kitahara.”
She looked him straight in the eyes, utterly earnest.
“…Excuse me?”
“I said I want to become your student,” Digital repeated sincerely.
Kitahara’s mouth twitched slightly.
“May I ask why?”
“Because I want to become a trainer,” she answered without hesitation.
“…And then?”
“And then, as a trainer, I could find my own Uma Musume tantou. I could eat with them, train with them, massage their legs after practice, help with their laundry and keep some pieces they don’t want…”
As she spoke, Digital’s expression gradually shifted, eyes glazing over dreamily, a trickle of drool escaping from the corner of her mouth.
“If we won races, we’d celebrate together. If we lost, I’d comfort them in my arms. Maybe we’d even have chances for hot spring trips, experiencing so many wonderful things… hehehe…”
Kitahara’s eye twitched at Digital’s escalating fantasies.
“Then why don’t you just go to a specialized trainer school?”
“Because there are no Uma Musume there,” Digital answered instantly.
Kitahara’s expression turned subtle.
“So basically, you want to spend your school years surrounded by Uma Musume, and then, after graduation, come right back as a trainer to spend even more time around Uma Musume?”
“Exactly! See, Trainer Kitahara, you totally get it!” Digital winked cheerfully, giving him a thumbs-up.
Kitahara remained silent for a moment longer, then asked:
“Then why not approach another trainer? You’ve interacted with plenty before, haven’t you?”
“Well…many reasons,” Digital pondered briefly. “Most trainers already have close relationships with their tantou. Joining their teams is one thing, but asking to be their student would be inappropriate.”
“As for the rest, most thought I was joking or advised me to become a journalist, nurse, or teacher—basically anything except a trainer. None of them took me seriously.”
“But mainly, if I ever became a trainer myself, I wouldn’t want my tantou to suffer. Of course, holding her while she cried wouldn’t be bad, but seeing her smile would be even better. Watching her celebrate on the winner’s podium while I cheer her on from below—that’s my real goal.”
Kitahara thoughtfully stroked his chin.
“So, you think I’m capable enough that learning from me would significantly boost your skills, increasing your chances of future success?”
“Yes.” Digital nodded earnestly. “So, Trainer Kitahara… could you—?”
Before she could even finish, Kitahara swiftly interrupted, shaking his head firmly.
“Nope.”
—
This is a fan translation of 人在特雷森，专职摆烂 by 多功能复读机 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!
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