“Guess I’ll have to use this to lure Albedo after all.”
After mulling it over, Gu Sanqiu ultimately decided against selling the item carelessly.
The primary reason was a matter of personal ethics as a Incense Burner; something like this going public could lead to serious consequences.
And, of course, his own reputation mattered. If someone in Teyvat managed to replicate the formula or find substitute ingredients, he’d rather not become a universally reviled target.
Better to present it to Albedo—he was likely to appreciate it, and Gu Sanqiu trusted his integrity.
After chanting the prayers and offering incense, Gu Sanqiu, exhausted from a disappointing day of gacha, collapsed into a deep sleep—only to be rudely awakened by loud knocking at his door.
“Who’s banging on my door this early? Don’t they know disturbing someone’s sleep is a serious offense?”
In a foul mood, Gu Sanqiu grabbed a long blade before swinging the door open. He froze in surprise.
“You’re back?”
Standing there was a girl in a black hat, sporting twin pigtails and a brand-new dress—the latest limited edition from Liyue, designed by a famed artist who had toured three or four countries. Every piece he released was a bestseller.
“Hehe, how do I look?”
Hu Tao spun around in front of him, her dress fluttering, smile as bright as a rare jewel.
“Hm, looks nice.”
Gu Sanqiu stepped aside to let her in. “What did you go off to do this time? And why the change of clothes?”
“Just official business. As the Hall Master, I have to set an example.”
Hu Tao puffed out her chest with pride. “So? Compared to you, lounging around all day like a salted fish, I’m the picture of diligence, right? You should praise me!”
“Yeah, yeah, Lady Hu is the best. Unbeatable.”
Gu Sanqiu clapped apathetically. “But you still haven’t explained why you’re suddenly wearing that dress.”
“Isn’t it pretty? I’m a girl, you know! What’s so strange about switching up my style once in a while?”
Hu Tao puffed out her cheeks. “I put this on the moment I got back, just so you’d be the first to see it, and this is how you react?”
“You changed the moment you got back? What, did you go feng shui consulting for that designer? Otherwise, how would a dress fit so perfectly?”
“Bleh, you just don’t know how to compliment people! I’m naturally beautiful—why should I conform to someone else’s fashion standards?”
Hu Tao raised her chin. “In fact, I’m the template they used to set clothing sizes!”
o(′^｀)o
“You sure seem confident after that trip.”
Gu Sanqiu tugged at her cheeks. “Now, out with it. What did you come here for?”
“Oh, right!”
Hu Tao clapped her hands, then cupped her face, tilting her head with an innocent expression. She even blinked those wide, gleaming eyes.
“Sanqiu, Qiuqiu~ Do you think I’m cute?”
“Yes, cute.”
Gu Sanqiu’s face remained neutral. “You’ve used this trick so many times I’ve lost count. Last time you did, you tried to con me into sneaking into the Golden House and leaving a ‘Gu Sanqiu was here’ message. Think I’d fall for it again?”
“At least you changed things up this time, wearing a new dress instead of your usual Hall Master outfit.”
“Spit it out already, or I’m going back to bed.”
“Ugh, you’re so mean, Gu Sanqiu!”
Hu Tao’s act cracked. She pushed him until his back hit the courtyard wall.
Smack.
With a playful grin, she planted a palm against the wall, raising herself on her tiptoes to meet his eyes.
“Alright then, whether you admit it or not, I’ll assume you think I’m adorable.”
“Sanqiu, I’m super cute. Now give me money.”
????
Gu Sanqiu stared blankly. “What’s gotten into you today?”
He fished a hundred-thousand Mora bill out of his pocket.
“If you need pocket money, just ask. No need for all these theatrics.”
After a moment’s thought, he added, “But switching up your wardrobe every now and then isn’t a bad idea. You should make the most of your looks.”
Hu Tao snorted, shaking her head.
“Not enough.”
“A million Mora then. But you’d better find some folks to help you haul it back to the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor.”
Money was a concept that held little weight for Gu Sanqiu. If Hu Tao wanted it, she could have it. The Gu family’s wealth was enough to last lifetimes—sharing the fun with a few close friends was a unique way to pass the time.
Still, Hu Tao seemed dissatisfied, her posture tense as she kept him pinned against the wall.
“Not enough.”
Gu Sanqiu’s eyebrow twitched. “Ten million? Now you’re getting a bit ridiculous for pocket money.”
“Not enough.”
…
He sighed, reaching into his robe to pull out a small, ornate jade seal.
“This is my personal stamp. Take it to any bank in Liyue, and as long as it doesn’t disrupt their operations, you have unlimited withdrawal rights. Is that enough?”
“Hmph, that’ll do.”
Hu Tao snatched the seal, glancing at him before turning her head with a huff.
“Hmph.”
o(′^｀)o
Gu Sanqiu rubbed his forehead. “What’s wrong with you, kid? Did the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor get sucked into some bizarre get-rich-quick scheme, or are you actually going broke?”
“Exactly! I’m teetering on the edge of bankruptcy!”
Hu Tao’s face crumpled, and she grabbed his arm, clutching it like a lost kitten.
“Qiuqiu~ If I go bankrupt, will you at least let me have a broken bed and a thin blanket in your woodshed? I’m low maintenance—I can survive on rice and veggies.”
“I’ll just be dying of heat in the summer, freezing in the winter, and starving the rest of the year. But Qiuqiu, you’ve already taken in poor, bankrupt Hu Tao, so I can’t be a burden to you.”
“First, I won’t let you go bankrupt. Second, neither will Liyue’s officials or your family.”
Gu Sanqiu rolled his eyes. “Third, if you’re living in the shed, all you get is a straw bed on the floor and leftovers—no other perks.”
“Fourth, keep up this dramatics, and I’ll take back my seal.”
“No way.”
Hu Tao hugged the jade seal to her chest, puffing her cheeks like a squirrel hoarding nuts.
“Do you think I’m joking? I’m serious—our family is going broke!”
“Ha?”
Gu Sanqiu’s face was pure disbelief. “Keep spinning those tales. Even if the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor were in trouble, your first instinct would be to earn it back, not beg me for money.”
“You’re one to talk! The only reason we’re in this mess is because of you!”
“What?!
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