“Passing through Liyue Harbor, and then coming here for a meal?”
Gu Sanqiu raised an eyebrow. After thinking about Granny Ping taking a pot of stew earlier, he seemed to grasp the visitor’s true intention.
This guy probably, maybe, just might be… a glutton.
But coming here right after Granny Ping delivered the stew? Was this guy not afraid of facing her wrath?
“What would you like to eat, sir?”
“Anything will do. As long as it satisfies me, any dish is fine,” the figure in the black robe waved his hand casually. “If you can please me, not only will the reward satisfy you, but I’ll also offer you some personal guidance.”
“Oh?”
A smile appeared on Gu Sanqiu’s face. Now this was getting interesting. After all, the Gu family’s rule of ‘welcoming gods and ghosts alike’ was no mere saying.
To know the taboos of the Fengxiang Man and still boast about ‘offering guidance,’ this fellow was no ordinary human. Most likely, he was one of those entities hidden in legends and stories.
“Please wait a moment.”
Gu Sanqiu turned toward the kitchen, pretending to gather ingredients while pondering the visitor’s identity.
“Coming in the middle of the night, and in such a hurry… If it’s a beast that has cultivated the Dao, which species tends to be impatient or act without thinking?”
“Hmm, Liyue doesn’t have anything like a husky, right?”
Gu Sanqiu carried out a chilled container, using Geo elemental power to bring over the leftover stove from earlier to heat oil in the pan.
“Impressive use of elemental power,” the black-robed figure murmured, rubbing his chin. “It seems there’s nothing I can teach you in that regard. Maybe I should think more along the lines of secret arts.”
Gu Sanqiu opened the container, and a strong fishy stench wafted out.
“This smell is intense!” The black robe twitched slightly. Any ingredient that reeked this strongly was bound to taste amazing, even if the chef’s skills were mediocre!
“Tsk, I was planning to use this for a prank,” Gu Sanqiu frowned, “I was hoping I could trick Hu Tao into eating this.”
Using Geo energy, he formed a clean pair of chopsticks and gingerly picked up a fish still dusted with salt grains from the container. Gu Sanqiu sniffed it, then cast a complicated look at the box.
“That smell… It’s been a while.”
Item: Offspring of the Silver Herring
Source: Some secret realm
Note: Which genius-level idiot thought this was a good idea? Using herring in brine, stinky tofu, fermented beans, and pickled puffins as the base, then creating a mini ocean world with the World’s Source? Who would eat seafood made like this?
Gu Sanqiu’s mouth twitched violently.
This is food? Or is that even the point?
This had to be some sort of biochemical weapon, right? A large-scale, deadly one!
Damn, so it turns out there’s stinky tofu and fermented beans in this mix too? In that case, maybe my luck today isn’t that bad after all.
At least it looks like fish.
At least it didn’t turn into something monstrous like “stinky tofu octopus” or “deep-sea fermented anglerfish.”
As the oil-fried, charred smell—no, make that the stench—filled the entire courtyard, the black-robed figure began to feel that something was off. If the initial fishy scent had piqued his appetite, now it felt as though someone had released toxic gas in front of him!
“Uh, kid, are you sure this is edible?”
“Of course! The Fengxiang Door is open, welcoming gods and ghosts alike. Naturally, I’m using the highest quality ingredients to serve you,” Gu Sanqiu replied with a straight face, though he was spinning lies. He had plenty of strange ingredients like this, but most were benign compared to this pungent abomination.
As for anything purple-grade, Gu Sanqiu figured if he ever caught one, he’d stay home for days just to avoid public embarrassment. Who wants to end up as a viral meme?
“Hah, I suddenly feel like saying, ‘thanks, but no thanks.'” The black-robed figure eyed the plated fish warily, fighting the urge to flip the table and flee.
“Please, enjoy, sir. It’s late, so I couldn’t prepare anything too elaborate. I hope you’ll make do with something simple.” Gu Sanqiu’s expression remained calm, though internally, he was enduring the same olfactory assault as his guest.
The only thing on his mind now was the hope that the stench wouldn’t linger in his courtyard for days. Otherwise, he might just find himself staying at an inn for a while.
“Is this food really safe to eat?”
The black-robed visitor’s skepticism was palpable.
“This is seafood. With this kind of fish, the stinkier it is, the better it tastes.”
“So, the better it tastes, the worse it smells?”
“Yeah, you could say that,” Gu Sanqiu replied, deadpan.
“Alright, I’ll trust you just this once,” the black-robed figure said, forming a pair of chopsticks from elemental energy. The fine detailing on the chopsticks hinted at his prowess.
“Hah,” Gu Sanqiu chuckled. Clearly, the visitor wanted to show off a bit.
As the first bite of herring entered his mouth, the visitor immediately felt the fish flesh dissolve into silky strands that flowed down his throat, like a school of fish diving into a waterfall.
“The texture is quite excellent, but the taste…” The black-robed figure lifted his hood, revealing a face covered in white fur with black stripes— a cat’s face.
“What the…?” Gu Sanqiu stared in disbelief.
A literal gluttonous cat!
“This flavor… It feels like a hundred bugs just burst in my mouth! Insane!” The cat-man grimaced, but, undeterred, he took another bite, giving Gu Sanqiu a shaky thumbs-up.
“Well done! I didn’t expect it, but the recovery effects are amazing. I feel like I could fight ten men right now!”
That part was true. Despite the overpowering stench, each bite of the herring was invigorating the cat-man’s body, filling him with strength. What’s more, the foul odor seemed to drown out all distractions in his mind, leaving only a clear, calm focus.
“No, it’s not just clarity,” the cat-man muttered to himself, “This is an amplification, a divine boost to my spiritual awareness!”
“Hahaha, I came to the right place today!”
Gu Sanqiu remained expressionless. He had never doubted the effects of the food. After all, everything his Golden Finger produced had always been beneficial, even if it came in strange forms. But what he did doubt was the cat’s sudden praise. It felt like the visitor was trying to trick him into eating some of it.
The item description was still fresh in his mind—this seafood was born from a mixture of herring brine, stinky tofu, fermented beans, and pickled puffins. There was no way he’d touch it, not in this lifetime.
And given how the usual sarcastic tone in the Golden Finger’s notes had escalated into outright outrage this time, Gu Sanqiu was even more convinced.
He wasn’t going to eat that.
Not in a million years. In fact, he might as well say it: “Hell no.”
A hundred different bugs bursting in your mouth? No thanks. Gu Sanqiu wasn’t about to experience that strange sensation anytime soon.
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