“Alright then, let me rephrase.”
Gu Sanqiu’s tone turned serious. “Bard Venti, could you give me a Seed of Power? Otherwise, I’ll throw you into Cider Lake.”
Originally, he’d thought of threatening to dump Venti at Cat’s Tail Tavern to hang out with the cats. But considering Venti’s penchant for mischief, the bard would probably end up drinking himself silly despite his cat fur allergy—and Gu Sanqiu might even get stuck footing the bill.
Worse, this rascal might pick up bad habits from his boss and start leaving tabs in his name. Imagining future foreign invoices piling up from Mondstadt was enough to give Gu Sanqiu pause.
“Sorry, that’s not going to happen,” Venti said with an air of nonchalance, speaking aloud now.
“You don’t think a bit of slime residue is enough to take me down, do you?”
Bang!
A muffled noise echoed as the ice and fragments binding Venti shattered into glittering dust. A powerful whirlwind swirled around him, gradually forming into the shape of an azure wolf.
“I see. You used tiny threads of Anemo to vibrate at high frequency between the ice and your body, breaking both the freeze and the array,” Gu Sanqiu observed calmly.
“Exactly~! Not bad, figuring out the trick so quickly,” Venti said with a bright smile. “Why don’t you play with this little wolf for a while?”
“Play? You think you can escape that easily?”
Gu Sanqiu snapped his fingers. “I only used three missiles to hold you down earlier.”
A larger golden array radiated from beneath Gu Sanqiu’s feet. In the sky above, Geo-element launchers materialized, each trained on Venti under his command.
“Ah! The bad guy’s trying to run away!”
Hearing Venti’s voice, Klee bounded over to Gu Sanqiu with a spring in her step. She rummaged through her backpack and pulled out a bomb.
“Here comes—Dodoco’s Special Bomb!”
Venti’s expression froze, while Gu Sanqiu maintained a composed smile. Still, one of his hands subtly formed a seal, ready to summon a massive shield to protect the nearby flora and fauna.
“Fire!”
The launchers roared to life, and Klee hurled her bomb without hesitation. Gu Sanqiu crouched down and scooped Klee into his arms.
“Cover your eyes,” he instructed.
The moment Venti heard that, his face paled. He immediately recalled the sinister bomb recipes Gu Sanqiu had been teaching Klee earlier.
Boom!
As expected, beyond the usual explosive force, Venti was hit with a barrage of bizarre bomb effects.
If not for the loyal azure wolf shielding him and the thick wind barrier he conjured to deflect the blast’s aftermath, that round of firepower would have left him thoroughly humiliated.
It was inevitable—though sustaining injuries was out of the question. If he, one of the Seven Archons, got hurt by two kids, he’d lose all face.
As the smoke cleared and the elemental energy dissipated, Gu Sanqiu raised an eyebrow at Venti, whose clothes remained pristine.
“Looks like you’ve still got some tricks up your sleeve. You even managed to suppress the surrounding explosions.”
Venti flicked his bangs with practiced flair. “Of course! I am a wielder of divine authority, after all.”
“Then try handling this.”
Gu Sanqiu formed a series of hand seals, summoning a massive Vajra Pestle once more.
“Mountain-Shaking Vajra Pestle!”
“Wait!”
Venti threw up his hands. “I surrender! I surrender!”
“Hooray! The Knights of Favonius’ anti-theft operation is a huge success!”
Gu Sanqiu was left dumbfounded as Klee jumped excitedly, thrilled by their “victory.”
The pure-hearted Little Red Riding Hood still believed that Venti was someone Gu Sanqiu had specially invited to play with her.
“No more, no more! Is it fair for the junior to keep hammering the senior?”
Venti plopped down on the ground, then lay flat with a dramatic sigh.
“I’m exhausted. I give up. If you want to keep attacking someone who’s already surrendered, be my guest. Otherwise, I’m out!”
For a moment, Gu Sanqiu was reminded of children throwing tantrums outside toy stores, flailing their limbs and crying.
No way… Just my imagination, he thought.
“Gruff!”
Klee struck a commanding pose, thrusting her right hand forward. “You’re a bad guy! As the Spark Knight of the Knights of Favonius, I’m officially arresting you! Surrender and accept Klee’s justice!”
“Sure, sure, no problem.”
Venti sat up with a cheerful grin. “And how will the great knight handle me? I promise to cooperate and reform myself.”
“Great? Klee is great?”
Klee’s eyes sparkled. “Really?!”
Venti nodded. Delighted, Klee ran to tug on Gu Sanqiu’s sleeve.
“Brother Sanqiu, isn’t Klee amazing? Super amazing!”
“Absolutely. One day, Klee will be the most amazing Knight of Favonius. The whole organization might even be under your command!”
“Yay!”
Klee dashed off to play, leaving Gu Sanqiu staring at Venti’s smug grin.
He actually found a way to turn this around, Gu Sanqiu mused, knowing that with Klee watching, he couldn’t continue going after Venti.
“Fine. It’s getting late anyway. Let’s head back to Mondstadt.”
“Hey, uh, Nephew…”
Gu Sanqiu shot Venti a sharp look. “Hold up. I’m not Gu Shen or Gu Sheng. Calling me Nephew feels a bit inappropriate, don’t you think?”
“What’s the big deal? Given my youthful looks, calling you Nephew is the least of it. Would you rather I have you calling me Grandpa or Great-Grandpa in public?”
Venti’s expression was shamelessly confident. “I’m a dashing and talented bard. Such titles would ruin my reputation with Mondstadt’s ladies.”
Gu Sanqiu rubbed his temples. “Honestly, I should bring the old man here to see what kind of nonsense you’re spouting…”
The group returned to Mondstadt, with Venti shamelessly hitching a ride. His excuse? “It wouldn’t be proper to display divine miracles before the citizens of Mondstadt.”
“Back in the day, whenever I traveled, the winds would follow me in harmony. Even the trees and stones couldn’t resist singing my praises,” Venti said with a dramatic flourish, clapping Gu Sanqiu on the shoulder.
“Consider yourself honored to escort me!”
“Honored, my foot. I’d rather slap you right now.”
Gu Sanqiu sighed, but he dutifully carried the sleeping Klee back to the Knights of Favonius’ headquarters.
“Hey, Nephew, since it’s such a rare occasion for us to meet, how about grabbing some good wine from the tavern, picking up a feast from Good Hunter, and finding a scenic spot to hang out?”
Venti’s grin was downright mischievous.
You just want to mooch off me!
Though exasperated, Gu Sanqiu begrudgingly followed Venti’s suggestion, stopping by the tavern and restaurant.
“This is fantastic! It’s been ages since I’ve had wine this expensive.”
Ignoring the food, Venti savored a glass of wine with such blissful abandon that Gu Sanqiu started wondering if the drink was drugged.
The bard had even picked the priciest options, only to shove the bill onto Gu Sanqiu.
“I’m debating whether to send this bill to the old man or the Church of Favonius,” Gu Sanqiu muttered.
“Oh, come now! Treating your elder to a good drink isn’t so bad, is it? Let’s call it even after the beating you gave me. Deal?”
Venti glanced at Gu Sanqiu slyly. “By the way, why were you so set on targeting me? Did your boss put you up to it?”
“Not at all,” Gu Sanqiu replied earnestly. “I recently provoked Inazuma’s Archon and got disciplined for it. This time, I wanted to test myself against a different powerhouse.”
“I’d originally planned to visit Decarabian’s domain, but I ran into you by chance while taking Klee out. So, my plans shifted.”
“Teaching kids is tricky, you know. You have to pick something they’re interested in and think through every little detail of the process.”
“In short, it wasn’t personal—just a coincidence.”
Venti chuckled softly. Gu family members might be eccentric, but their kindness never wavered.
Still…
The bard threw an empty bottle at Gu Sanqiu.
“‘Just a coincidence’? You think four little words can brush off the pain you caused me, you brat?!”
—
T/N: venti feels so olddddd oh well
This is a fan translation of 原神之璃月奉香人 by 淡白蛋清. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!
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