Uma Musume: Your Uma Has A Problem! [200]

Kagura lay in her room for a while. Seeing the agreed time was getting close, she pushed herself up, about to grab her phone and message Ardan to ask if everything was ready—

When she heard a knock at the door.

She hopped down, slipped into her slippers, and opened it to find Nature outside.

“Hi~ I’m here~”

Nature waved, looking a little shy. Her cheeks were still pink—and what puzzled Kagura was that when Nature had come out earlier, she’d been wearing a light-blue set of pajamas. Now she was in light purple pajamas and shorts. She’d clearly changed.

“Uh… Nature, did you change? What happened?”

“I—well… I went back to my room to drink some hot water, and when I was pouring it, I bumped the kettle and spilled it. My clothes got wet, so I changed.”

“Huh? You knocked over a kettle with hot water? Let me see—did you get burned?”

The moment Kagura heard “hot water,” her expression tightened. She didn’t give Nature a chance to protest—just stepped forward, grabbed her by the shoulder, and tugged her inside.

“I-it’s fine! Kagura, you don’t have to worry!”

The second Nature said it, she regretted it.

She’d forgotten Kagura had that switch-flip mode: the instant she heard “injury,” she became that Kagura. And in that state, Kagura was downright scary.

Besides… Nature hadn’t knocked over any kettle at all. She’d changed for a completely different reason. One that made her feel guilty just looking at Kagura.

And no matter what, she couldn’t tell Kagura the truth. It sounded way too weird.

Sorry… Kagura…

As Kagura fussed over her and checked her over, Nature apologized silently in her head.

Kagura looked her up and down. Only after confirming there were no burns—no red marks, no blisters—did she finally let out a breath and release her.

“Honestly. Still so clumsy. If you’re living alone, you’ve got to be more careful.”

She patted Nature’s shoulder, then even helped straighten the pajama top she’d ruffled in the process.

“Hehe…”

“Oh, Nature-san, you’re already here? What are you two doing at the door?”

Bizen Nishiki stepped out of her room in pajamas, hugging a pillow. The moment she looked over, she spotted Kagura and Nature.

“I heard Nature spilled hot water on herself, so I was checking if she got hurt.”

“Huh?! Do you need bandages or anything? I brought some medical stuff with me!”

The second Bizen Nishiki heard “hurt,” she hurried over with the same worried energy, trying to look Nature over too.

“No, no—Nishiki-san, don’t worry! I just got a little water on my clothes!”

At this point, Nature could only commit to the lie. No matter how she imagined it, the real reason would be… well.

Not something you said out loud.

“Oh? Looks like everyone’s getting impatient. It’s not even time yet, and you’re already gathered at the door.”

“Evening~ Ardan-san, you finally made it!”

Bizen Nishiki waved at Ardan, who’d just come out of her room, delighted—like she was welcoming a party guest.

Ardan returned a gentle smile. She’d come out a bit late tonight. Mejiro Ramonu had said she wanted to see what this “horror pajama party” was all about, but then she got dragged into chatting with Maruzensky and the others. Apparently they’d started some kind of game in Ramonu’s room and even pulled Rudolf and Maruzensky in, so in the end she didn’t come.

Ardan was a little disappointed.

Just like during the day, Kagura’s room had no lights on for atmosphere. Ardan had even brought a small blue-green lamp. In the darkness, that eerie little glow looked like a will-o’-the-wisp. Outside, the wind still hadn’t fully died down, and now and then it shoved something into a creaky, whining complaint.

If nothing else, Kagura had to admire Ardan’s talent for setting the mood. It was honestly a waste she didn’t run her own paranormal radio show.

“Uwah…”

The movie hadn’t even started, and Bizen Nishiki already looked like she could feel cold air drifting around them. Nervous but excited, she instinctively edged closer to Kagura.

“Honestly, Ardan-ojousama kind of reminds me of that yokai from legends—Aonyōtō.”

“Ah—do you mean the ‘master of Hyaku Monogatari’? I’ve read that story too… It’s a shame I can’t gather a full hundred tales. Otherwise I’d love to try imitating the game.”

Ardan perked up immediately. She’d always been into ghost lore, and she hadn’t expected Kagura to know about it too.

…

The four of them squeezed onto Kagura’s bed, with Kagura wedged right in the middle. And tonight’s horror movie was clearly scarier than the daytime pick. It was hard to believe such a quiet, refined young lady had hundreds of gigabytes of horror films saved—classics included, like The Grudge and The Ring.

Kagura couldn’t help wondering why Ardan liked watching things this creepy.

Liking it is one thing… but if it scares you this badly, why keep watching?

With Ardan hugging her from behind, Kagura couldn’t help thinking it. Nature and Bizen Nishiki being scared made sense—Nature was still young, and Bizen Nishiki was earnest and pure. But Ardan had seen so many horror movies… and she still got scared too?

And since everyone was in thin pajamas tonight, Kagura could feel the softness pressing against her even more clearly. Still, the others seemed completely absorbed in “appreciating” the film—trembling like leaves—so Kagura didn’t dwell on it.

Kids were kids.

Nature and Bizen Nishiki really do look terrified… Yeah, maybe something like The Grudge is just too much for them…

Ardan was “trembling” too as she held Kagura, but she could tell Kagura’s resistance to this stuff was absurdly high. Kagura didn’t look scared at all—she watched the screen for a bit, then started watching everyone else’s reactions instead.

Ardan kept catching Kagura’s barely-contained smile. Kagura looked like one of those veteran viewers who’d already cleared the main story and was now hopping between streamers just to watch their reactions.

Meanwhile, Nature and Bizen Nishiki were clinging to Kagura so hard they’d practically wrapped both hands around her arm. Ardan could tell exactly where their limits were.

…

No idea how Ardan’s doing over there. With Rudolf and Maruzensky—those two heavy hitters—gone, it’s just Nature and Bizen Nishiki, two innocent kids. Surely she can handle that, right…?

“Hey~ Ramonu~ Don’t zone out—your turn!”

“O-oh! I play this +2! Rudolf, you following? If not, you’ll have to draw six!”

“I follow. How could I not? +2! Maruzensky, your turn!”

“Didn’t see that coming, did you? I’ve still got a +2, Ramonu~?”

“What? Where did you pull another +2 from?? This deck has that many +2s?!”

…

If the hotel’s soundproofing were a little worse, the neighbors next to Kagura’s room would’ve heard terrified girls screaming off and on all night. Anyone who didn’t know better might’ve thought something truly uncanny had appeared inside that pitch-black room.

Of course, even though they’d been scared all night, after yelling for so long, Nature and Bizen Nishiki actually felt refreshed—like they’d vented something out. Maybe watching this stuff really could be a form of emotional release.

“Whew… it’s really late… We should stop.”

Ardan shut off the equipment as she spoke and started tidying up.

Bizen Nishiki sat by the bed hugging her pillow, pale with fear—looking like she wanted to climb down, but didn’t dare.

“What’s wrong? Nishiki-san, you look like you’ve got something to say.”

Seeing how thoroughly shaken she was, Kagura almost laughed.

“Th-then… um… Kagura-san… I have a request, if you don’t mind…”

Face white as a sheet, Bizen Nishiki turned to Kagura and asked in a trembling voice.

“Go ahead.”

“C-can I stay here tonight and sleep with you? I… I’m scared to go out there… What if something drops from the ceiling and grabs me and bites my head off…”

“…”

Kagura nearly lost it. It was like being at work, seeing something hilarious on your screen, and having to swallow your laugh at your desk.

Ardan, who was packing up, and Nature, who’d turned halfway to climb off the bed, both perked up instantly. They froze, listening—waiting for Kagura’s answer.

“Sure. If you’re really scared, you can stay. My bed’s plenty wide.”

“O-okay! I’m saved!! Thank you, Kagura-san!”

Relieved like she’d just been pardoned, Bizen Nishiki lunged forward and hugged Kagura. Kagura nearly got tackled flat onto the bed.

After calming her down a little, Kagura lifted her head and looked at the other two. Both were clutching pillows, faces caught somewhere between fear and hope.

Kagura understood immediately.

“Uh… fine. The bed’s wide, and you’re all pretty slim. It should work, right…?”

“Thank you, Kagura!!”

…

——That evil spirit is such a loser! Its scare tactics are so low-level! Boring!

Eclipse-san, horror movies are built on human imagination grounded in reality. No matter what, they’re still limited by what’s plausible… Critiquing them with a ghost’s-eye view is kind of unfair.

——My take is, it’d be better if I came up and did the scaring myself. Three go in and one comes out—what kind of horror is that? The real essence is three go in and four come out. Then nobody makes it home!

Eclipse-san, it’s honestly a tragedy you don’t make films!!

—

This is a fan translation of 你这后勤马娘有问题啊 by 惰性大发 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!