Thanks to the speed of the Ley Lines, Lumine quickly arrived at a high point overlooking the area. Gliding down with her Wind Glider, she soon spotted Jax, who was barreling forward with Teucer perched on his shoulder like a human chariot.
“Got you!”
Lumine dismissed her Wind Glider mid-air and landed ahead of Jax’s path on a nearby slope. Pulling Paimon along, she prepared an ambush.
As Jax’s thunderous steps drew closer, Lumine sprinted and leaped from the ridge, carrying a flailing Paimon with her.
“Jax! Face the justice of the righteous!”
While airborne, Lumine deftly hurled the fully-armored Paimon straight at Jax’s head.
“Paimon Super Headbutt!”
Paimon screeched as her helmeted head collided with Jax’s black dragon-helmet. The clash rang out with a resounding clang, leaving Jax momentarily dazed from the impact.
By the time Jax regained his senses, Lumine was already upon him.
With the agility of a seasoned fighter, she grabbed Teucer from Jax’s shoulder, twisted in mid-air, and planted both feet firmly on Jax’s helmet.
“Traveler’s Flying Kick!”
Momentum shifted entirely as Lumine landed gracefully on the ground, holding Teucer securely in her arms. Jax, on the other hand, was sent hurtling into a roadside patch of grass, landing in a heap of armor.
“You’re amazing, Miss Lumine!” Teucer’s eyes sparkled with awe. “How did you do that?”
Meanwhile, Paimon wobbled up from where she’d landed. Though her miniature armor had protected her from harm, she was clearly dizzy.
“Ugh…”
Jax’s head emerged from the grass, his helmet caked with dirt and leaves. “Oh, it’s you, Lumine! For a moment, I thought I was under attack by mountain bandits…”
“And who told you it was okay to run off with Teucer without saying a word?” Lumine chastised him, hands on her hips. “Do you know how much effort I put into deciding to help Childe babysit his brother while we’re in Liyue?”
“Not to mention, you went to find Childe for fun and didn’t even invite me!” Lumine’s next words betrayed her true feelings. “What kind of friend doesn’t include me in their plans?!”
“But wasn’t it faster this way?” Jax said, brushing dirt off his helmet. “Teucer can’t use Liyue’s Ley Lines, so I carried him the whole way. You using the Ley Line teleport was bound to be quicker anyway.”
Jax gave Lumine a thumbs-up, flashing a grin through his helm. “I figured someone like you wouldn’t let me get away that easily!”
“That… kind of makes sense, right, Lumine?” Paimon said, still a little dizzy.
“But couldn’t you have carried me and Paimon, too? You run so fast—I want to try riding with you!” Lumine retorted.
“That’s not the point!” Paimon interjected, exasperated.
Paimon also made a mental note to keep her little set of armor in pristine condition. In a world as chaotic as this, having Jax and Lumine as companions posed more danger than any adventure across the Seven Nations.
After some back-and-forth, Lumine and Jax eventually came to a truce. For the remainder of the journey, they struck a peculiar agreement:
Jax carried Lumine on his shoulders, with her arms wrapped securely around his head. Teucer sat on Lumine’s shoulders, while Paimon, the smallest of the group, perched on Teucer’s.
This three-meter-tall human tower tore across the Liyue landscape like a living battering ram, startling countless birds and beasts along the way.
—
By the time they arrived, Childe was standing atop a high vantage point, addressing a formation of freshly recruited Fatui soldiers below.
“There he is! It’s my brother!” Teucer whispered excitedly, ducking into a nearby bush. “Shh… he’s about to speak!”
“Alright,” Lumine agreed, leading the group to hide in a spot where they could listen without being spotted.
As Childe began his speech, Lumine’s sharp gaze analyzed the recruits. She had agreed to help babysit Teucer, but that didn’t stop her from gathering intelligence. This might come in handy if we ever go to Snezhnaya…
“From this day forward, you will embody Her Majesty the Tsaritsa’s will!” Childe declared loudly to the recruits. “Sacrifice everything in service to Snezhnaya’s victory!”
“You must sweep across the battlefield like the northern cold front! Be as unyielding as the frost on the Snezhnaya Palace that hasn’t melted for a millennium. Let the enemy feel the bone-deep chill of the Tsaritsa’s will!”
“Her Majesty demands your loyalty! Precision! And unflinching discipline…”
As Childe spoke, his words faltered.
In the distance, he had spotted Teucer’s excited face peeking out from the bushes, along with the unmistakable shape of Jax’s armored silhouette, which was impossible to hide.
“Uh… and our enemies… for example…”
Childe struggled to recover.
“For example… kites! Rattles! In the Liyue market, they are formidable rivals to Teucer’s favorite, the one-eyed treasure trooper!”
“Pfft…” Lumine struggled to suppress her laughter.
The recruits below, however, looked utterly bewildered.
Jax, observing the scene, had half a mind to record it and show it to Zhongli later. He could already imagine the headline: “Harbinger Childe Loses All Credibility—Moral Decline or Human Folly?”
Desperate to salvage the situation, Childe pressed on.
“Er… as they say, the battlefield is like a marketplace! It was just a metaphor!”
Childe’s voice rose in an attempt to regain control. “As your marketing officer in Liyue, I demand absolute obedience to my orders! Defying commands is tantamount to betrayal, and the price of betrayal… is being expelled from the—uh, Liyue Toy Research Institute!”
“Huh?” The recruits looked more confused than ever.
Meanwhile, Teucer whispered, “Getting expelled from the institute must feel terrible, right?”
—
T/N: Paimon -> Teucer -> Lumine -> Jax
This is a fan translation of 武器大师在原神绝不死于徒手 by 徐人双 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!
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