“Coconut… goat?”
The figure on the rooftop wavered slightly at Lumine’s words. “What is a Coconut Goat…? I am Ganyu, secretary to the Liyue Qixing. For this occasion, I am acting as Lady Ningguang’s special envoy.”
With a graceful leap, the figure descended from the rooftop, landing lightly in front of the group.
“I’m here to deliver a message on behalf of Lady Ningguang,” Ganyu explained, her elegant features framed by her blue hair, a striking contrast to the red and black horns atop her head.
Lumine’s gaze swept over Ganyu with curiosity. “But you really do look like a Coconut Goat… Are you a half-adeptal beast? Your horns are beautiful! Are they real?”
Closing the distance, Lumine peered intently into Ganyu’s face, making the adeptus blush and avert her eyes. “I… I do possess adeptal blood, but as for being a Coconut Goat…”
“You really are a half-adeptal beast?!” Lumine exclaimed, grabbing Ganyu’s hand in excitement and turning toward Zhongli and Jia Changjiang. “See? I found the Coconut Goat! Qiqi is going to be thrilled!”
“Um… actually, I’m here to extend an invitation from Lady Ningguang. To the palace in the sky… Could you, uh, let go of me first?” Ganyu stammered, clearly flustered.
“An invitation? What does Ningguang want with me?” Lumine asked, leaning even closer to Ganyu. “And hey, do you have time later? Let’s visit Qiqi together! She’ll love meeting you!”
“I… I…” Ganyu’s face reddened as she gently pushed Lumine away before retreating hastily.
“She ran off…” Lumine said, watching Ganyu’s disappearing figure.
“Of course, she ran off! You scared her away!” Paimon retorted. “Anyway, since we’re heading to see Ningguang, shouldn’t we prepare something first?”
“Hoho… Being invited to the Jade Chamber is a rare honor,” Zhongli remarked. “But don’t forget about the Rite of Parting. Once you return, we will regroup at Dihua Marsh.”
After setting the next meeting point with Zhongli, Lumine turned to Jia Changjiang, only to find him surrounded by empty wine bowls, asking the tavern owner for more.
“Do you have anything stronger?” Jia Changjiang inquired.
“We do, but it’s quite potent,” the proprietor replied. “In fact, this very brew was once enjoyed by the Geo Archon himself. However, few can manage three bowls of it, giving rise to the tavern’s name, Third-Round Knockout.”
“Then bring me three bowls!” Jia Changjiang thumped his chest confidently. “Don’t worry, I can handle it!”
The tavern owner, amused by his bravado, quickly brought out three large bowls of the legendary wine. The other patrons turned their attention to Jia Changjiang’s table, curious to see if he could conquer the challenge.
“Mr. Jax, are you sure you can handle all that?” Paimon asked skeptically.
“This? Back when I drank with Venti, we had way more!” Jia Changjiang lifted the first bowl, tilting it back and drinking deeply.
A trickle of wine escaped the corner of his mouth, dampening his collar, but he finished the first bowl in one go and slammed it down on the table to a round of applause from the surrounding crowd.
Without hesitation, he picked up the second bowl and downed it just as quickly, drawing even louder cheers. Some patrons abandoned their own drinks to crowd around, eager to witness the spectacle.
After finishing the second bowl, Jia Changjiang casually popped a few peanuts into his mouth before lifting the third bowl. The crowd began chanting, “Drink! Drink! Drink!”
“Alright!” Jia Changjiang chuckled, slightly tipsy. “Once I finish this, if anyone’s interested—and if our storyteller here doesn’t mind—I’ll share a tale of my own. This wine pairs perfectly with the story I have in mind.”
The storyteller, Tian Tiezui, leaned forward with intrigue. “If you’ve got a story to share, by all means! Storytelling is about entertaining the crowd, and with your impressive drinking, I’m sure your tale will be just as compelling.”
“You can tell stories too?!” Lumine and Paimon exclaimed, their eyes sparkling with anticipation. “We’ve never heard you tell one before! Come on, tell us!”
“Alright!”
Jia Changjiang lifted the third bowl, drained it, and stood up, making his way to the storyteller’s platform. Borrowing Tian Tiezui’s fan, he snapped it open with a flourish, fanning himself dramatically.
“Tonight, I’ll share the tale of Wu Song, the hero of Jingyang Ridge!”
The crowd murmured with interest as Jia Changjiang began his story.
“Now, Wu Song, also known as Wu the Pilgrim, was no ordinary man. Many titles were attributed to him—Wu Erlang, Wu the Tiger Slayer…”
Using the lingering warmth of his drink, Jia Changjiang launched into the saga of Wu Song. He started with Wu Song’s return to his hometown of Qinghe County, painting a vivid picture of his journey to Jingyang Ridge.
When he reached the part about Wu Song’s legendary feat of drinking eighteen bowls of wine at the inn, Jia Changjiang glanced at the tavern owner and quipped, “Third-Round Knockout? Wu Song laughed in the face of that!”
The patrons roared with laughter and admiration as Jia Changjiang continued, recounting Wu Song’s epic battle with the tiger. His storytelling was so immersive that the audience could almost see the ferocious tiger and feel the tension of the fight.
From there, Jia Changjiang narrated Wu Song’s journey—avenging his brother, the blood-soaked massacre at the Mandarin Duck Tower, and his transformation into a wandering outlaw at Erlong Mountain.
As the tale reached its climax, Jia Changjiang ended with a poem that perfectly encapsulated Wu Song’s character.
“Let me conclude with this…”
Jia Changjiang slapped the table and recited:
“With a resolute body and a dignified face,”
“Eyes shining bright as stars in the night,”
“Brows black as lacquer, bold and unbowed,”
“A chest broad enough to crush a thousand foes.”
“His voice rings proud, ambition soaring high,”
“Heart of a lion, strength beyond measure.”
“Bone and sinew forged of unyielding steel,”
“A god of war, descending to the mortal realm.”
With a snap of the fan, Jia Changjiang finished:
“Like a heavenly demon quelling chaos,”
“He is the scourge of the wicked, the mortal tyrant’s bane.”
The room erupted in thunderous applause, with patrons shouting their admiration for both the story and the storyteller.
—
This is a fan translation of 武器大师在原神绝不死于徒手 by 徐人双 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!
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