Was the road to the divine realm easy?
You could hardly call it easy. If anything, it was absurdly difficult.
Ishtar knew that better than anyone. Her true body had once traveled between the divine realm and the surface world as a matter of course.
She had gone to the Underworld before, and she had blasted Mount Ebih as well, yet in her eyes, reaching the divine realm was no easier than either of those places most people feared even hearing about.
She could even say the Underworld was the easiest of the three. You only had to find the right place, go BOOM!, and that was that.
Of course, descending to the Underworld and pushing deep into it were two entirely different levels of difficulty, and Ishtar had no intention of explaining the difference.
Even so, she still believed reaching the divine realm was far harder than either of those.
She had always been perfectly clear on that. The only reason she had been able to come and go from the divine realm freely before was because it had never been closed. That was the whole point—it simply never shut its doors.
Now it had closed, and she had no way in at all.
“A one-way trip? Gil, do you even know what you’re saying?”
A bitter smile touched Ishtar’s lips.
“In the whole world, only a handful of major gods can still move back and forth once the divine realm closes like this. No one else can.”
“Oh.”
Gilgamesh gave a flat little “oh,” the sort of response that made it painfully obvious how little he was moved by her warning.
“And what grand idea do you have instead, goldie? Hmm?”
The instant Ishtar heard that careless “oh,” irritation rose in her chest for reasons even she could not quite name. She puffed out her cheeks and glared at him.
Her expression said it all: If you don’t have a better idea, then just stand there and watch what a goddess can do.
Gilgamesh did not know whether to laugh or sigh. This goddess really had changed quite a bit, and somehow she still had not noticed it herself.
“Enough sulking, mongrel. I have actual business to handle.”
With that, he turned his attention to the system.
System, find me an item that can take me to the divine realm.
[WHAT?!]
The system instantly sounded on the verge of exploding again.
[IT’S ONE THING FOR YOU TO MOOCH OFF ME, BUT NOW YOU WANT ME TO HELP YOU MOOCH OFF ME TOO! YOU GET SCAMMED, AND THEN YOU EXPECT ME TO HELP COUNT THE MONEY AFTERWARD? WHAT KIND OF DREAM DEAL IS THAT?!]
Don’t be like that I’m your host, am I not~? And this is the first favor I’ve ever asked of you~
[DAMN IT! NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT!]
Gilgamesh had been about to continue persuading her, but the moment the system said that, a thought suddenly flashed through his mind.
Door…
His eyes lit up.
Right. A door. System, exchange for an Anywhere Door.
[UH…]
The system froze, but her body was honest, and the interface obediently popped up on its own.
[ANYWHERE DOOR (DORAEMON VERSION)]
[ANYWHERE DOOR (SYSTEM-MADE)]
What is the difference?
Looking at the two versions, Gilgamesh took the obvious route: when something was unclear, you asked.
After all, his knowledge had not yet reached the omniscient heights of some future president from a certain beautiful country. He was still operating within the realm of normal human comprehension.
[THE FIRST ONE IS EXACTLY WHAT IT SAYS—THE ONE DORAEMON AND THE OTHERS USE. THE SECOND IS A FUNCTIONAL CONSTRUCT PRODUCED BY THE SYSTEM ITSELF.]
The system explained, very much against her will.
[SYSTEM-MADE ITEMS ARE NOT NECESSARILY SUPERIOR TO THE ORIGINALS IN TERMS OF FUNCTION, BUT THEY CAN ACHIEVE ABSOLUTE EXECUTION. FOR EXAMPLE: THE ORIGINAL ANYWHERE DOOR IS A TECHNOLOGICAL DEVICE, SO ERRORS SUCH AS MISDIRECTED TRANSFER ARE POSSIBLE. A SYSTEM-MADE ONE WILL NOT MALFUNCTION.]
I see.
Gilgamesh nodded.
Then I’ll take the system-made version.
[100 POINTS DEDUCTED.]
Wait. Why is it so expensive?!
Gilgamesh was genuinely stunned. Even Ea had only cost a little over ten points.
[EXPENSIVE?!]
The system sounded as though she were about to cry again.
[DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT MAKES THIS ITEM AMAZING?! IT ISN’T THE BASIC FUNCTION. IT’S ITS NATURE!]
That was right. The truly frightening part lay in that absolute property.
The system slowly explained it to Gilgamesh, pride threading through her tone.
[ITS GUARANTEED FULFILLMENT IS LIKE AN OBJECT FALLING UNDER GRAVITY, OR LIGHT TRAVELING AT LIGHT SPEED IN A VACUUM. NOTHING CAN CAUSE IT TO FAIL. AS LONG AS IT FALLS WITHIN THE ALLOWED FUNCTIONAL RANGE, IT WILL DEFINITELY HAPPEN. NOTHING CAN PREVENT IT FROM ACCOMPLISHING WHAT IT IS MEANT TO DO.]
How is that even possible?!
Gilgamesh was honestly shocked.
How could he not be? It was almost the same as the system creating an object completely unconstrained by ordinary rules.
An object like that could stand before the laws called reality without yielding in the slightest. Everything else fell downward, while it could ascend of its own accord. Everyone else went east, while it alone insisted on going west.
This Anywhere Door was the same. If the original technological version could not open a door directly into the divine realm, then the system-made one could. Because that was its function—and any obstacle in its way would simply be overruled so the door could open.
Nothing could stop it from carrying out its function. Only it could restrain itself.
That should have been a truly terrifying concept, but once one considered that the system itself already existed—something even less compatible with common sense—it no longer felt quite so outrageous.
[HAHA… WELL… THIS IS A LITTLE EMBARRASSING TO EXPLAIN.]
The moment Gilgamesh pressed further, the system’s proud tone immediately shrank back, and she let out an awkward laugh.
Go on. I am your host. I won’t laugh.
[IT’S JUST… WELL… I USE THE SYSTEM’S POWER TO FORCE THAT RESULT TO HAPPEN.]
Now Gilgamesh was interested.
Explain that more clearly. I want the details.
[AHEM. IF YOU WANTED AN APPLE TO FALL UP INTO THE SKY INSTEAD OF DOWN FROM A TREE, WHAT WOULD YOU DO?]
Umm…
Gilgamesh thought it over, then answered with some hesitation.
Catch the apple, then throw it upward as hard as I can.
[RIGHT… THAT’S THE PRINCIPLE. I’M NOT MAKING THE APPLE FLY UP ON ITS OWN. I’M USING A HAND WITH INFINITE POWER TO HOLD IT UP AND CARRY IT THERE.]
Gilgamesh’s expression froze for a moment, and then understanding dawned on him.
He got it.
In truth, it was simple—brutally simple. The system had not actually designed some object that could ignore every rule and every obstacle to impose its own laws. It was merely using its own infinite power to force system-made items to fulfill their intended functions.
In an instant, the whole thing lost a great deal of its grandeur in Gilgamesh’s eyes.
What is this nonsense?
He was at a loss.
I thought you had actually made something absurdly overpowered, and this is all it is?!
Just like that, the apple that could rise on its own, defy the laws of reality, and radiate supreme grandeur suddenly became painfully ordinary.
That was the truth behind this Anywhere Door.
It was not that it could ignore all obstacles and open anywhere by itself. It was that the system’s mysterious power was carrying it there and forcing it open.
Whatever.
Gilgamesh shook his head.
The end result is basically the same.
[RIGHT, RIGHT, EXACTLY! THE END RESULT IS BASICALLY THE SAME.]
The system seemed to recover some confidence at once and immediately began boasting again.
[AFTER ALL, YOU WILL NOT FIND ANY POWER GREATER THAN MINE, SO THE ABSOLUTE NATURE OF MY ITEMS IS THE REAL THING.]
[THE SAME APPLIES TO THIS WORLD. IF I WANTED GRAVITY TO BEHAVE LIKE REPULSION, ALL I WOULD HAVE TO DO IS APPLY A FORCE TO EVERY OBJECT EQUAL TO TWICE THE GRAVITATIONAL FORCE ACTING ON IT, IN THE EXACT OPPOSITE DIRECTION. WOULDN’T THAT MAKE GRAVITY FUNCTION LIKE REPULSION? THERE WOULD BE NO NEED AT ALL TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE GRAVITY ITSELF VIOLATE ITS OWN NATURE.]
Wait, wouldn’t that destroy the world?
Gilgamesh shot back.
Enough nonsense. Make the exchange.
This is a fan translation of 我要往王之财宝里再加点东西 by 海绵宝宝宝宝 Rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!
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